This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

“Do you know what we ought to do? Giggle snort, guffaw, titter. We should, we should paint Chinese Flags on our aircraft and bomb the shit out of Russia! Get it? Huh, get it? Ain’t that a real knee slapper? I thought that one up myself.” The former orange Pwesident who just twelve days ago, thought Vladimir Putin was the coolest guy on the block. A genius (Look who’s talking) making a really smart move by going into Ukraine, like he did.

This is called fade to insignificance. The crazy old man on the front porch giving sage advice. “When I was a boy, we would use shoe nails as toothpicks and would masturbate with mayonnaise and the Sears catalog. But the kids don’t do that anymore!” Donny, what’s the capitol of North Dakota? “Canada!” I bet his meetings with the Joint Chiefs of Staff were legendary. “Why don’t we just take the space shuttle and fill it with guns and stuff, and soldiers and then just swoop down! At, at, at, at, at, Pew! Pew! Pew! Bang! And then just fly off? Why can’t we just do that?”

An all thumbs on deck attempt to change the subject, after sucking up to and praising, the most hated man on the planet. Offering his strategic vision for where Joe Biden has gone wrong, and they say irony is dead. Professor Langley is gonna give the Wright Brothers, a few pointers on building an aero plane. Suddenly Putin is a bad guy, and why didn’t Joe Biden do something him sooner? Why didn’t we send more weapons sooner? What was the hold up? (Oh wait, forget that one.)

Two weeks ago, the Republicans blamed Joe Biden for inflation, and for high fuel prices. Today, they demand to know why Joe Biden didn’t cut off Russian oil imports, two weeks ago? Mike Pence, after missing his shot at fame and treason, tries a little cheerleading for the other side. Calling Biden’s moves “weak” in the face of a European Capitol being bombed. Never having sat at the big table with the adults before, Mike doesn’t know the etiquette for proper behavior during war.  I’ll bet you twenty dollars; he’s never even heard the names, Vidkun Quisling or Lord Haw, Haw.

The Russian juggernaut grinds towards disaster,  as 95% of all Russian troops assigned, are now in the field. Russia has around 280 thousand men in their army, and all but 80K are in the field, in Ukraine right now. Like a Kamikaze pilot, you won’t be relieved. So, who do you suppose, are still at home? Generals and Kremlin secretaries, budget analysts, base commanders, janitors, and the people who don’t know a Kalashnikov from a Baryshnikov. This is almost everyone useful, they got with a uniform. And they can’t call for the reserves, because there aren’t any!

Then I read the report, where the Russians had lost NINE combat aircraft in a single day! I thought, that can’t be possible, as even four or five aircraft, would be a catastrophe. (How I lost a Billion dollars in a day) Then I saw the story repeated by a reliable intelligence source. In WW2, they would send off 300 planes, and 275 would come back. Factories churned out a bomber an hour.

But the whole idea of spending all that time and money on an aircraft, is to prevent losing them through electronic counter measures. In a good year, The Russians procure between twenty and seventy new aircraft, per year total. And the Russians have already lost one year’s production and are starting in on year two.

During the first two days of the campaign, the Russians fired 250 cruise missiles. Since then, they have fired 350 missiles more, or just 35 a day. Just being frugal or are the inventories starting to get a bit low perhaps?

Churchill refused to send more RAF squadrons to France, because he knew if France fell, they would be needed for the Battle of Britain. The Russian Generals must be asking themselves the same question, by now. How many more missiles can we afford to send to Ukraine? Now that the whole world is aligned against them, and they might not be able to easily replace their existing inventories?

The Russian have 13,000 main battle tanks and in war, you bring the best ones you got first. I’d wager even money, that you couldn’t even get the engines started on half of those tanks. Even, If you had all day and a large can of starting fluid. Half of their tanks in the field now are old T72s, like Saddam once had. Vehicles with rotted tires and no winches to pull themselves out of the mud. With twelve-month conscripts, watching the clock. No maps or GPS. I watched Russian POWs interviewed. And while my Russian is poor, it was the soldier’s appearance; I was really interested in.  

Most of all, they were older. Some in their 50’s and some a little portly with a little grey in the beard and the image came to mind of Sargent Schultz. After capture, they were, of course haggard. But some wore incomplete uniforms or wore civilian sweaters over their fatigues because they were cold.  Poorly equipped, poorly trained, and poorly led. This high-tech war stuff requires cohesion, or it doesn’t work at all. Part of an anti-aircraft radar system is no anti-aircraft radar system.

Losing nine aircraft in a day on the modern battlefield. In a single day, means that you won’t be trying that stunt again. Whatever you’re doing, stop it! Or as General Pickett once observed, after a particularly bad day. “Sir, I have no division.”

If you can’t control the sky after losing forty aircraft in twelve days. You’re not going to control the sky period. And if you can’t control the sky. You can’t protect the ground. If you can’t protect the ground. You can’t win the war. Russia accuses Ukrainian pilots of running for NATO borders for cover and refueling. What makes you so certain the pilots in question are Ukrainian? But who didn’t see that coming?

This isn’t the Grand Army or the Afrika Corps, off for an adventure. This is it; this is what they got. The whole Russian Army. They don’t have another one at home getting ready. I read that the Russians are now trying to disguise their fuel trucks to look more like regular trucks. Seems they are in short supply, and somewhat flammable. Who didn’t see that coming? How many hands full of Diesel fuel, does it take to fill a tank? How long does it take to fill one, with two-liter bottles?

Any Russian General worth his Vodka, can see the handwriting on the wall. Pointlessly expending ammunition on a lost cause that they might dearly need someday, down the road. To win the war but lose the army doing it. To lose the flower of their air force and years’ worth of production capacity, leaving them extremely vulnerable.

With NATO forces growing on their border daily. Armed with high-tech weaponry that really, really, works. Growing in strength every day, as the Russian Generals watch their own warehouse shelves empty. Never mind Ukraine, like Dunkirk. How much of this army and their equipment, will they ever be able to save to make it home again?

Exhausted, depleted, and naked before the world.

“The Battle of the Ukraine is almost over. The Battle of Russia is about to begin.”

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