This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

He’s the frontrunner who no one wants around. Why, if it wasn’t for Donald Trump, little Ronnie DeSantis would be a shoo-in for the Republican nomination. But because of Donald Trump, little Ronnie is unloved and unwanted and seen as a usurper to the throne of Lord Trump. He is everything that Trumper’s hate while agreeing on all the issues. DeSantis is in competition with their orange lord and savior.

A long-time Republican strategist declares Ron DeSantis to be the worst candidate ever! Is Ron really the worst candidate ever or is DeSantis running against the worst candidate ever and favorite of the long-time Republican strategist? Is it the beginning of the internal Republican civil war?

DeSantis does his best to campaign like Donald Trump even mimicking his movements. Two days after Trump slammed electric cars; DeSantis vetoed a bipartisan bill saving Florida taxpayers millions of dollars because the bill promotes electric cars.

The Florida Reich’s Fuhrer received a nasty letter from the Iowa GOP over his use of paid help canvasing for votes. Penis envy? Or in the name of all that’s holy and Donald Trump desist at once! Little Ronnie will be considered a disloyal heretic. As long as Trump is free and breathing air. For the Anti-Trumpers he’s the only hope of saving their Party. But for Trumper’s, DeSantis is the devil. For having the temerity to attempt to dethrone their Christ.

Little Ronnie’s campaign efforts have stumbled a bit out on the road. The act doesn’t play as well up Nawth. The DeSantis campaign throws out imaginary red meat to the crowd. “I’m going to fight against woke leftism! I’m going to do away with four government agencies billionaires really hate, when I’m king!”

Then little Ronnie is accused of funneling $92 million in Covid Relief funds to political donors. I wonder how that news ever got out? The DeSantis campaign is surrounded by enemies loyal to the orange Jehovah. Chris Christi takes a swipe at DeSantis over his tepid January 6^th remarks. Then asks, “did he have a TV? Was he alive that day?”

So, what does Christi gain by attacking DeSantis? The attack helps Trump and not Christi. Like most of the Republicans in the match box of presidential timber. Which one’s are really running for office, and which are running as an echo chamber and Trump foil? The only Republican campaign issue really out there is Trump, and on that issue, there is no compromise.

Christi and Asa Hutchinson and even Nikki Haley have made semi critical remarks about Trump. Christi (New Jersey) and Trump (New York) have been political allies for many years. You can’t bankrupt a casino by yourself, you know. You’ll need help! And you’ll need friends! New Jersey (Christi) were waist deep in financing of the Atlantic City casinos with state bonds. All done in the name of job creation. And everyone involved made money, except the for the poor suckers who still have to pay for it.

So, is Christi really running against or is he schilling for Trump by running defense? Hutchison and Haley are running for? Name recognition? Fund raising? Mike Pence is the only Republican soundly in the Anti-Trump camp. It sets him apart and accounts for his poor showing in the polls. The one Republican who did the right thing on January 6^th and what does he have to show for it? How do Republicans respond to his patriotism and loyalty to the Constitution? Heartache and a lousy seven percent in the polls. 

Each Republican candidate that enters the race dilutes the vote and aids Donald Trump’s primary victories. No candidate can breakthrough in the primaries because the vote and the public’s attention are divided by eleven. Eleven favorite sons and daughters. A Governor from North Dakota and a mayor from Miami? Has beens and wanna be’s never wases and dreamers running against the great and mighty Trump. Who are they kidding?

Trump is running against DeSantis, and DeSantis is running against Trump and Trump’s Republican Party. All the others are playing defense for Trump. There is not one alternative universe in a million alternative universes out there where Nikki Haley actually becomes the Republican nominee for President. It is a certainty in an uncertain world that you and I won’t be nominated for President, and likewise neither will Nikki Haley.

It is a show pony campaign. Everyone agrees with everyone on most of the issues. So how can they differentiate themselves from each other and gain advantage? It’s the dullard parade, the long march of the wooden soldiers. Inside of the cult’s-controlled media atmosphere the duller they all are, the brighter Trump appears.

They take a few minor swipes at the Orangeman to distract like reactive armor, but still publicly they support Trump. Only Christi and Pence have been overtly critical of Trump. DeSantis makes himself a target by his grandstanding. He’s going to do this, and he’s going to do that! The Thomas Dewey conundrum, they more times you boast and exaggerate about what you are going to do. The less people will begin to believe you.

DeSantis struggles as a sad sack of. That boss, who everyone hates. Mr. Anti Personality. Richard Nixon sober. Even when he smiles you want to cringe. His outspokenness has built himself a near insurmountable wall of negatives among the general voting public. So, if on the off chance that Mr. Trump is somehow unable for some unknown reason to fulfil his Presidential campaign duties. The Republican front runner will be their avowed enemy. The poison pill.

Checkmate Trump. Trump is obviously the cult favorite. Anyone who runs gainst him can expect to face a wall of acrimony and mistrust. Locked behind the Eightball the Republicans must vote for their king or face the torch of the usurper’s reign and call for Barabbas. He who would dare dethrone Trump.

The most dangerous wild card out there besides Donald Trump’s ongoing legal milieu is Rudy Giuliani. Rudy is going to try to save his own worthless broke ass hide. Easy come easy go, huh Rudy? Rudy has a well-known penchant, a knack if you will for animated storytelling and could easily blow this thing wide open before the November elections. Rudy saw it all. Rudy participated in all, and now Rudy will tell all.