This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

Ron DeSantis tells on himself, explaining that voters need to meet him to like him. Leaving the open admission that voters don’t really like him very much now. But internal Republican polling is saying Republican voters really don’t like any of the candidates, including Donald Trump. Call it the Trump fatigue syndrome.  

The voters still call themselves Republicans, because they are far too polarized to call themselves Democrats or anything else. But they grow weary of the Biden scandal of the week show. Screaming Jym Jordan and mud wrestling Marge Tater Greene. There is a growing acceptance that Donald Trump did wrong and is wrong, about most everything. But, but, but Donald Trump is way ahead in the polling.

Donald Trump has name recognition and a cult following and against the backdrop of lackluster competition is the clear favorite. Chris Christi says, Donald Trump deserved to be indicted and deserves whatever he gets. And yet, no lightning bolts have struck him down from Olympus on his way to the Buffet. Donald Trump’s cult controls 30% of the Republican Party, enough to easily win any poll hands down, but far from what is needed to win an election.

If you can’t beat them, dilute them. The Republican Astroturd groups are popping up like madness in the spring. Robert Kennedy Jr. and “No Labels” and alleged Democrat Joe Manchin whines, “Oh garsh, we need more choices. We’re disgusted with both parties. It is an admission that the Republican Party is dead in the water and coming apart at the seams.

The Republican extremists in power have driven away suburban voters, women and the young. Leaving only the extremists to mind the store, but instead they’ve burned it to the ground. There is a photograph of Marge Tater Greene on the phone with Trump during Kevin McCarthy’s castration leadership vote. Trump pulling the strings behind the scenes has brought them to naught.

At the midterms Republicans ran on curing inflation and delivered Hunter Biden’s laptop and hearings on TikTok and defunding the FBI. That’s what Donald Trump wants, not what the voters wanted. The Republican Congress runs defense for Trump as the voters grow tired and weary of the shenanigans.

The voters have watched a litany of January 6^th defendants sentenced to hard time prison. They aren’t outraged, they’re weary. In the back of their minds they understand. They won’t come right out and say, “Boy, was I ever taken in!” They just stop paying attention. The settlement of the Dominion voting case against Fox News has put a permanent crimp in the Fox News audience.

The firing of the little Tucker fucker its self was an admission of guilt by Fox. The viewers tuned out as little Tuck, tuck laid plans to retake his throne as King of the conservative media. But the road is rocky and Tucker’s Twitter show has been a raging mediocrity. From millions of viewers to a few hundred thousand. Tucker is fading like cheap barn paint and has no place left to go but down. He’s doing his Twitter shitter for Gratis! Free! No pay Jose!

The conservative media has lost its voice as Republicans fist fight in Michigan and are evicted in Minnesota. Marge Tater Greene runs Kevin McCarthy like her servant, and all McCarthy can do is answer, “Yes, ma’am.” The Free dumb caucus boots Marge Greene, but no one has the nerve to tell her publicly. Marge demands someone tell her to her face that she’s out and gets no reply. “Squeak! Maybe we should just leave a note on her door or send an email.”

No leadership in the House and tottering Mitch McConnell in the Senate. And Trump and Trump and Trump! If Trump decides he wants to take a submarine ride down to see the Titanic, many Republicans would gladly offer to pay his fare. He has become the millstone around their necks and scuttling charge of their ship of state.

Ron (Don’t call me short) DeSantis was the big money boy’s great white hope. After two months of an announced candidacy and $8 million spent has made ZERO progress, despite two years of unannounced campaigning. Obviously, Little Ronnie has a likability problem. He admits it himself, but why? His message stinks to high heaven, that’s why. His anti this and anti that rhetoric. Lectern pounding tough guy.

 Out to beat the crap out of Mickey Mouse. Out to rid the world of wokeism…snore. Appealing to the extremists and those firmly attached suckers to Trump’s backside and so, he wins neither. In trying to imitate Trump he locks himself out of the Republican house. The buffoons and billionaires are rapidly losing patience with DeSantis. Wondering if throwing good money after bad might not be better spent on Astroturd groups. If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, maybe you can baffle them with bullshit.

Senator Mark Kelly warns about groups like “No Labels” diluting the Democratic vote. But I’m not scared. The Astroturd groups are plastic and can’t grow because of it. Their message is fake, and the leadership is disingenuous. “Hey Kids! Don’t you want to listen to some Pat Boone records? He sure is cool; I tell you what! He’s lots better than old Jerry Lee Lewis or Little Richard.”

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that Donald Trump’s message would grow stale eventually. The big money push behind Retro Ron DeSantis is the proof. They wanted someone Trump like, but not Trump and it’s NO SALE.

Trump’s message has degenerated down to threats and poor, poor, pitiful me. Just wait until I’m in power again, then I’ll make the bugger’s eyes water! And not to discount Trump, for he can still draw a good crowd in a secondary market on a Saturday night, if it’s free. But echo chambers of the good old days and remember when, won’t win any elections.

Trump is under indictment and headed for more. Rudy Giuliani is headed for disbarment. Mike Lindell is headed for bankruptcy. The Republican Party is dead in the water and Tucker can’t swim.

“Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don’t think that I can make it because it took so long to bake it, and I’ll never have the recipe again.”

“Can you honestly love a dishonest thing?”
― John Steinbeck