This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

“Ah ha,” the walrus said! This is perfectly not clear… not! Revenge is the soup of the day and is best served cold. When last we left the hapless houseplant Republican Matt Gaetz, he was savoring his recent victory over Kevin McCarthy and was cleaning the blood from his knife.

Gaetz was anxious to torpedo McCarthy as payback for McCarthy forwarding an ethics complaint against Gaetz for inappropriate behavior with some young ladies. Conduct unbecoming a privileged frat boy. In truth, McCarthy had his hands tied. It is hard to bury a sex story once it goes public. Gaetz was using a cash app to pay for the services of an underaged prostitute. The house investigation was meandering basically towards nowhere and would have died a quiet death. But the hounds of law enforcement had caught the scent and been awakened.

In a story which could only have a blue dress with spots on it to be complete. A witness has come forward in the Gaetz case, and she kept texts and receipts, just because. Because she’s a modern prostitute with office skills and good record keeping practices. Never suspecting for a single moment that such information could be valuable someday, and perhaps wildly lucrative.  

The broken man Kevin left office promising revenge and now, a witness with receipts! Sex Parties! Drugs! And worst of all…receipts! Just because the house investigation was unsuccessful didn’t mean they didn’t find out stuff. And maybe a phone call was made by a friend of a friend to follow up perhaps on certain persons with specific information, photographs and receipts!

“The woman” says she was hired to work drug fueled sex parties. But wait; don’t order now! The woman’s attorney says, “Multiple Drug Fueled Sex parties. This wasn’t a fluke; this was a regular Saturday night at Matt’s house. This is the death grip. This about finishing Matt Gaetz once and for all with or without the help of the Federal correctional system.

To sully his name beyond all election. Gaetz had already made it clear he was willing to leave the house quietly to take over for the term-limited Ron DeSantis as Governor of Florida. But first, there was the revenge factor in toppling Kevin McCarthy.

Harry Truman once advised, “Never kick a fresh turd.”

And then, “The woman” testified before the Justice Department and told them just everything with her receipts. With 8 x 10 color glossy photographs with circles and arrows with descriptions on the back. The ugly words “Child sex trafficking investigation” being thrown around.

Even in the dimly lit world of the Republican party, it is obvious. No Republican candidate can achieve victory while under investigation for child sex trafficking. It doesn’t matter if she was almost eighteen, does it? Why do you think they call it Jailbait? Iceberg dead ahead!

But then a friend of a friend of a friend contacted the witness asking; “You’re not talking to anyone about our little parties, are you? Hint, snitches get stitches!” Add witness intimidation (here) Nothing sharpens the point on the investigation quite like a little witness tampering.

Just one more leak in the S.S. Republican Party. FBI informant arrested for lying about Hunter Biden. After a year of championing the oh, so damning information. The house Republicans now stand with nothing but their junk in their hands. Just like that it’s all over. A solid year of Fox News propaganda down the drain! Well, Republicans started the impeachment with nothing and now they’ll finish it the same way.

One more Republican failure to throw on the fire and as today is a day of truths. The truth is coming loose about Donald Trump and Republican reticence. Cause see, when she got there the cupboard was bare and so the poor dog had none.

There is a hole in Donald Trump’s arm where all the money goes. Keeping Donald Trump in attorneys is getting expensive. Republicans worry maybe Trump will be too expensive to allow other Republicans time sucking at the Party tit. Not enough money to go around. Sorry, but we must keep Trump in attorneys!

Trump in control of the Republican Party as he is currently attempting to do will assure, one for you and nineteen for him. Trump’s legal standing amounts to a Stalingrad. A situation where all the blood and treasure will be expended to fight off the legal inevitable. Effectively putting the crackhead in charge of the party debit card. Some wonder if that’s wise?

Republicans who understand the emphasis thrust and planning is only about saving Donald Trump and the Republican Party can all go to hell. This campaign is Donald Trump’s Revenge tour, and the Republicans can all go get stuffed.  The monster has taken over, and Dr. Frankenstein is about to be torn limb from limb.

As Speaker of the house Republican Mike, what’s his name, holds up military aid to Ukraine. Russians and Vladimir Putin plan to put crude nukes in space as a satellite defense. Mike, what’s his name offers, “It’s no big deal! Not to worry!”

Trump needs Putin’s help and as a sign of good faith has made the Republicans into the isolationist Party. Taking a page from Neville Chamberlain, house Republicans insisting Putin isn’t a threat to the west. Then the story emerges of Russian nukes in space. Just coincidentally of course.

Republican promise – No threat from Russia! News – Deadly threat from Russia!

It’s all coming apart at the seams like a cheap suit of clothes. Lauren Boebert goes district shopping and comes in fourth. We now know what Matt Gaetz thinks with. George Santos’s old seat was won by a Democrat with many more to come for the same reason in the coming season.

“The truth is ‘what is.’ If ‘what is’ is, you have to sleep eight, ten hours a day, that is the truth. A lie will be: People need no sleep at all. Truth is ‘what is.’ If every politician from the beginning is crooked, there is no crooked. But if you are concerned with a lie, ‘what should be’-and ‘what should be’ is a fantasy, a terrible, terrible lie that someone gave the people long ago: This is what should be-and no one ever saw what should be, that you don’t need any sleep and you can go seven years without sleep, so that all the people were made to measure up to that dirty lie. You know there’s no crooked politicians. There’s never a lie because there is never a truth.” ― Lenny Bruce