This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

How do you spell DESPERATION? They put J.D. Vance in the basement and assigned him to guard the bee. Somehow through apparent negligence and mismanagement he got loose, found a reporter, and tried to help. “You know, if you elect Donald Trump, he’d veto any nationwide Abortion ban.” All while the candidate is running non-stop round the clock advertisements nationwide bragging about ending Roe v Wade.

You’ve made your bed fellas, sleep tight. Either naivety, arrogance or just plain gross stupidity. Sure, sure and free healthcare and we’ll forgive student loans too, yeah that’s us man! Welcome to all my Latin American Amigos!

I used to work at a gas station down the street from an insurance company’s home office. Every Monday morning they’d called the droids in for a Ra, Ra, fear of god pep talk. Now you go out there and sell, sell, sell!!! So, I’d get three proposals to buy life insurance before noon being the closest gas station to the highway out of town. I think maybe somebody had that talk with J.D. The sky is falling! Don’t just stand there! Get out there and sell, sell, sell!

It isn’t the lie; it’s the audacity of the lie which bothers me. “I’ll bring back the dead! I can spin straw into gold! (Won’t you guess my name?) We will have three days weekends, every week! It’s all gone wrong, and they know it, and this is ruination they have come too.

J.D. has repeatedly gaffed by going off message. Either he’s been poorly trained or just stupid. Donald Trump is the nominee, and they can’t both go off message. Somebody has got to stay home, and it probably isn’t going to be Donald.

At this point, it doesn’t really matter all that much what J.D. actually says. It’s just the shock value by now really. Is he that stupid or does he think we are? A campaign becalmed when the magic suddenly stops. The frustration of nothing going right. A candidate with his own personal representative on the campaign management team. Apparently, Mr. Trump doesn’t trust their judgement and so he needs eyes in the room at all times.

Mr. Trump can’t or won’t stay on message either purposely or inadvertently. And any way you reduce the fractions, that’s not good. An already irascible, Mr. Trump is even more conflicted like a coiled spring beginning to lose its strength. Panicked and pleading, I’m way ahead in the polls! Everybody says so! And in the swing states too! When universally it is obvious. Donald Trump has struck an iceberg, and his campaign is taking on water.

So, Mr. Trump takes to Twuth Social to hint and or imply, he might not debate on September 10^th on ABC as planned after all. They are mean to Donald Trump. So, Mr. Trump doesn’t want to play in their sandbox. It is certifiably an insane statement to make. For a campaign trailing and losing speed it screams “CHICKEN SHIT!” He’s scared out of his wits and not sure he wants to come out from behind the couch. That’s all-very Hollywood. The star needing to be coaxed out of their dressing room.

Mr. Trump knows what happens when you perform badly in a debate. He knows this one is for all the marbles. Either President, inmate, or international flight risk. Chances are, Mr. Trump will be on his mark September 10^th making his comment even more insane. Why would you say something like that? It makes Mr. Trump look like a chicken; doesn’t he see that?

Either debate, quit or shut up about it, but don’t whine.

There is more at stake here for the Republicans than just the White House. If Donnie and J.D. fall off their skateboard and make with the cry, cry, baby talk. The turn out will be crushed. Thousands of mail in ballots won’t be turned in. Hundreds of thousands if not millions of Republican voters won’t stand in line. On a cold November day to vote for Donald Trump when it appears obvious, they are going to lose.

For a Republican campaign to go from one or two points up in the polls to down seven! Good God, that’s disastrous. Unrivalled in American politics. Now according to the latest polls. Mr. Trump finds himself down by 15% with women. Women obviously, make up half the population and tend to vote more often than men. That means for Mr. Trump to be competitive in the race. For every million votes cast, Donald Trump needs an extra 150,000 men to vote for him to make up for the deficit. I think you can see the problem.

States are in play which should not be in play. Unless the Republican campaign is in real trouble. Part of the reason they picked J.D. Vance in the first place was his mid-western background. J.D. was going to help the Republicans carry Wisconsin and Michigan. And now, they might not even carry J.D.s native Ohio? Words fail to explain how bad that is for a Republican campaign. Ohio was supposed to be money in the bank. They were going to build on Ohio! That was a part of their strategy.

In the words of Groucho Marx, “Either this man is dead, or my watch has stopped.” Win, lose or draw Mr. Trump must now carry on as cogently as possible. Not cry and wheedle or piss and moan about poor me all day. He has to take one for the team or the whole Republican Party could go down the tubes with one mighty whoosh. I think you can see the problem.