This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

By demonizing immigrants, the team of Trump & Twaddle hope to create a visual. Instead, they create a smell. A foul aroma which excites a memory. Refreshing in us our memories of what a Donald Trump Administration was actually like. Bomb threats, accusations, lockdowns. Violent threats, angry voices, innuendo, and a constant barrage of lies and bullshit.

In the center ring, your ringmaster Donald Trump. Don goes on the road repeating a racist lie that goes back more than sixty years. Then when asked to explain himself Trump answers, wha? Who me? I don’t know what you’re talking about. I just repeat what I heard. I didn’t tell anyone to phone in bomb threats. These droids work on autopilot and need no prompting.

But poor little Springfield is under assault by bomb threats. And just because you’re crazy, doesn’t mean you don’t know you’re losing ground. But I’ve always heard if you really planted a bomb why would you call to tell them about it? Like keyboard warriors they’re telephone bandits. Desperate to buoy the flagging Trump campaign by supporting him with a good old-fashioned bomb threat. Hospitals or police stations any old public place will do. “Take that Haitians! I’ll threaten to blow up the hospital! Vote Trump!”

The simian Trumpers howling at the moon in support and frustration. Venting their spleens and unleashing their anger. Raging at innocents over events which never really occurred. Raging over the events they dare not contemplate. The sad ending in the last chapter. Trump got smoked in the debate and they know it. It’s all gone wrong! We’re not winning anymore. So, let’s kick over some sand castles.

Comedian Bill Maher says he thinks Donald is having an affair with Laura Loomer. That’s amazing Kreskin! What tipped you off? Trump breathing or Loomer letting him touch her. You know when you’re rich they just let you. What first tipped me off was the look on the face of the guy in the background of the photo. A look of stunned surprise. Like, wait a minute that’s not right. He’s married. The lecherous old sun king chasing after the young maidens around Versailles.

The second thing alerting me was this photo was political dynamite, and I had to go to “The Times of India” to find it on the Internet. I even did a tin eye search to try and find the original source. It’s almost certain other members of the press have witnessed Trump’s similar recent prurient behavior and kept their lens caps on. A Presidential candidate frolicking with a junior staff member not yet half his age? Not news?

Just imagine when Donald told his wife Malaria. “We’re going away together for a week. But it’s just business honey, just a part of the campaign. Nothing to worry about honey. You know how the press likes to blow these things all out of proportion.

The foot soldiers are out tromping in the mud while the King is playing the “touch this” game with his new girlie. It is also very, very telling. The mass criticism Ms. Loomer has received from Republican Party stalwarts. Criticizing Ms. Loomer for the ugly remarks she makes. She says crazy Reich wing stuff and so, do they? So, what’s the problem? The problem is diddling with the big orange fool. Who’s self-entitlement makes Donald think he can get away with anything. But they don’t dare criticize the King and draw attention to the affair. It must be all the peasant girl’s fault.

Mr. Trump refers to Tim Walz as the next Vice President. They know! Trump could conceivably lose in Alaska. No Republican has lost in Alaska since Barry Goldwater. North Carolina is in play as Arizona and Georgia lean blue. If it’s close in Alaska, it ain’t going to be close anywhere else. This has all the earmarks of the last days at the Fuhrer bunker. Live it up today for tomorrow we all die.

What would a public affair do to the Trump campaign right now?

What would your spouse say if it was you in that photo? “Honest honey, I was just showing her how tight I could hold her if there was ever an earthquake. I was showing her how we used to doubles roller skate. Do you know why I was with her? Because she reminded me of you! She asked if my pants had a metal or a plastic zipper and I said, I wasn’t really sure, and she was checking for me.

Why isn’t this big news from Lompoc to Saskatoon? Why is an incriminating photo of Donald Trump largely blacked out of the Western Hemisphere? Kamala Harris was asked about an affair which occurred fifteen years ago, and Donald dances with Eva Braun under the glittering disco ball and the press are silent?

Donald’s reputation for philandering is famous. And all the previous accusations have all been cushioned by time. Now in real time. Perhaps it’s time to trade in the old porn model for something new? The glow of infatuation exposed in a public affair. No cameras please!

“There is only what is.”
― Lenny Bruce