This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

The double cross is always a common tenant of Fascism. Hitler gave the Labor Unions the Labor Day holiday they had been asking for. Then he did away with the Labor Unions. The pharmaceutical industry gave more to Republicans than Democrats in this last election cycle. Their reward? RFK Jr. the barbarian. Elon Musk gets down on all fours and lets the King ride him around like a pony. His reward? Talk of doing away with electric vehicle tax credits.

And Elon is going to need those credits. His star has reached its apogee and will soon begin to set. Hard to believe in this day and time, someone would actually be dumb enough to fall for Trump’s scam. But then, Derwood Duh What walked in. Class! What happens when Donald Trump doesn’t need you anymore? That’s right class. He stops taking your phone calls. Elon should call the pillow guy or Rudy Giuliani for some pointers on alienation.

Dip your feet in extremist politics and alienate half of the car buying public. Subaru rescues puppies, Tesla rescues Donald Trump. Ironically, alienating the only half of the car buying public interested in purchasing electric vehicles. Only to win the favor of those who want to get rid of Electric vehicle tax credits. Tesla once cool, ain’t cool anymore. Before it’s all over, you could get beat up driving around in a Tesla. He’s the enemy now. His friends ignore him, and his enemies can’t stand him.

He was once a pampered pup. “Oh great, Elon’s here! Now, we can start the party!” But the election is over and there has been a great deal of push back. Maybe, the “Department of Elon’s ideas might have to be shelved. But we’ll call you! Good to see you again! Tell the wife I said hi. You have a safe trip now back to wherever it is you came from.

Elon still has SpaceX, but Republicans in power are famous in the space industry for two things. Big talk about space projects and little funding. George Bush the lessor was putting us back on track to return to the moon just twenty years ago! During the night of the long knives, it is going to be difficult to wrangle any budget increases. Going to Mars? Mars, Ohio, maybe.

During the last Trump nightmare, the king raised tariffs on steel because foreign competition was taking unfair advantage of honest hard-working American steel producers. Honest hard-working American steel producers then immediately raised their prices to match the foreign steel with the tariff. If the King were to impose tariffs across the board it would become a license to steal. The problem being it won’t work in the auto industry. There are too many plucked chickens out there now and not enough fat ones.

They aren’t selling enough new cars now as they are too expensive at near half the price of a slum property. Gee, what happens when there is an oversupply of goods, and the public can no longer afford  to purchase them Mr. Wizard? Starts with a “D” and ends in a soup line Bobby. But not to worry, Incompetence is our ally. Nuclear war, now that’s a real concern. The Iranians have promised not to try and assassinate the orange King. Thank you, I guess. But there is a growing tiff among the wise Russian oligarchs who fear the King can’t be trusted.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

The post-election Wall Street honeymoon has lasted for two whole days. As the King names his rogue’s gallery of the incompetent, the indices begin to leak down with the realization Trump really means it. More expensive new cars! Layoffs at domestic companies, short orders for steel and components. Doing away with electric vehicle tax credits. Debbie Wasserman Shultz says, Tulsi Gabbard (Madame Secretary) is probably a Russian asset. Good grief, King Donald the blabbermouth has a bathroom filled with classified documents and I should worry about Tulsi?

The tariffs will have the effect in China of pouring salt in an open wound. As producers of tee shirts or tube socks won’t be able to retaliate. They will do the next best logical thing and go out of business, and China won’t appreciate that. It amounts to economic warfare. His plums cost a dollar and yours cost a dollar and a half. Because I say so! You’ve been exclusively selected for collective punishment.

European and NATO leaders are telling their governments to dramatically increase their defense spending quick! As apparently, they sense some sort of political instability on the horizon which might lead to a war. Gee, I wonder what they are all so worried about all of a sudden?

It seems the King’s plan to end the war in Ukraine in a single day has hit a snag and will take a little longer than expected. As both the Russians and the Ukrainians have rebuffed the King’s overtures. Gee, it just all seemed so simple. I’ll just tell them to stop.

Always remember what Lenny Bruce said, “If you can’t say fuck, you can’t say fuck the government.” Social media is to be used for dog and cat photos only! Funny videos or advertisements with cute, animated spokesmen. Oh boy, isn’t technology wonderful? How did we ever get along without this stuff? Social Media is not ever to be used as Social Media. The transmission of political ideas outside of organized channels of approved media sources is not to be allowed in social media. You need protection!

You will think either this way or think that way. There are only two choices, black or white or heads or tails. You are allowed to object, but don’t be difficult.

“There is nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission. If we wish to make it louder, we will bring up the volume. If we wish to make it softer, we will tune it to a whisper. We will control the horizontal. We will control the vertical. We can roll the image, make it flutter. We can change the focus to a soft blur, or sharpen it to crystal clarity. For the next four years, sit quietly and we will control all that you see and hear. We repeat: There is nothing wrong with your television set. You are about to participate in a great adventure. You are about to experience the awe and mystery which reaches from the inner mind to… The Outer Limits.”