This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

I just don’t know sometimes, it’s so difficult to just play along. Gee whizz, what a shocker! The King is disrespectful. Is that really news at this point? Are you surprised the King raises his flag before the official mourning period has ended? And then suddenly, as if by magic, Texas Gauleiter Gregg (Bubba) Abbott says, it’s okay to raise the flags in Texas. Gee, color me shocked. Monkey see, monkey do as he’s told.

Marge Traitor Greene, Congresswoman from GEORGIA is losing her mind over three thousand miles away fires in CALIFORNIA. When you believe in fire gods and fairy spirits and things suddenly go wrong, the true believer calls for an ole timey tent revival! Anybody surprised? How can I exploit a situation which has nothing to do with me? How can I impress the simple minded and the slow witted by tying my name to current events? [SEE: Thoughts and prayers.]

Is this the way it’s going to be from now on? News Flash: KING IS A JERK! KING SAID SOMETHING STUPID! KING PISSED HIS PANTS! WAR DECLARED! Play by play and blow by blow? KING SUSPECTED OF CRIMES! BRIGHT LIGHT IN SKY RISES IN EAST! Picking at scabs and only making it feel worse.

Oooh, look what he’s doing now! Oooh look, the New York Times is kissing his ass again. Oooh look, Marge Traitor Greene is acting crazy again. Just to express the insanity. The new Vice President says Jan 6^th insurrectionists should be punished. But only the ones who were violent and broke things. That’s a pretty thin slice of bologna there. Following that logic, only the hijackers who actually flew the planes were guilty.

But we are through the looking glass and so far down the rabbit hole we can no longer see the rim. We’ve seen the lightning, but we’ve yet to hear the thunder. Crazy is sane! Black is white! Up is down! “It’s good you did that Anthony, it’s real good that you did that.” To watch is grotesque but to look away is irresponsible. The shortest distance between these two points are antidepressants and alcoholism. It really can’t be healthy to watch every day, let alone to chronicle. “Hi, I’m your on-the-spot reporter for the Hiroshima Daily.”

Chronicling Torquemada! The Daily Brutal! All the emotional and mental torture that fits. Futility dies in the darkness. Tell the truth and you’ll be lonely. What next? Deportation humor? Let me tell you about how stupid the King is! “How stupid is he?” That’s what killed the Gong show! That constant drumbeat of the same inane, day after day. What can you do for an encore? What else can you show me?

How about that first invisible lady, huh? No, not Laura. His real wife Malaria, the one with the seven-foot-tall anchor spawn. I haven’t seen her in nie onto a coon’s age. Will the current and future former Mrs. Trump attend the inaugural? Will she list it on her resume’ as a professional modeling appearance and photo shoot? His pretend wife like his pretend life? (Sssh, you can’t say that.) All hail Nero! The Master of all Rome! (The Master of Puppets) Stretch Armdumb! Anybody got a light? Did you leave something simmering on the stove perhaps?

It’s only a small kitchen fire but the King has it fully under control. Maybe it’s better if you don’t watch at all. Stay away from the Brown acid man. But it’s your trip…man! All we know so far for sure, so far is the King will cut taxes for the rich and the king won’t cut taxes for the rich. The King says he’ll call out the Army and the Army says, don’t count on it. The King will deport millions while the King won’t deport millions. The King will pardon the insurrectionists and the King won’t pardon the insurrectionist. They also serve who sow only confusion.

It’s like the game Mouse Trap. Fate is about to turn the handle and drop the mousetrap on us. What then? Welcome to Pottersville? Take what you can get? “I got mine man, keep your hands off of my stack.”

“It’s troublesome to do right and it ain’t no trouble to do wrong, and the wages are just the same – Mark Twain

I once owned the record album, “Electric Ladyland.” Then, I owned it on eight track then cassette and then CD. Guess what will happen to K-Mart, I mean Blockbuster, I mean Facebook? Times change management doesn’t. I’m telling you; Devo is the future of all music! Firing what little attempt at fact checking is Facebook’s admission of defeat and surrender. I give up! I’ve got more money than I need, and this whole thing is becoming a burden to me. Fuck it! Let it fritter away. See if I care!

Facebook’s move is seen as partisan, but it’s anything but. The lies are already up there, this move is about being lazy. Lazy bean counting management well aware the crazies have already moved on to new and more fertile pastures of fresh green insanity. The glory days are over, and this is the rump management and cleanup crew. Squeezing the last nickels from every last cow before calling the butcher shop for a pickup.

It’s hard not to be a nihilist but even harder to be optimistic. The historical comparisons couldn’t be any starker and foreboding. Stalin, Mussolini, Pinochet and even the H man himself. So, I really don’t want to hear about all their unkempt shoes or unpaid parking tickets, overdue library books or poor table manners. I don’t care if the devil wears a dirty tee shirt. Tell me about the look in his eye.

“But if we fail, then the whole world, including the United States, including all that we have known and cared for, will sink into the abyss of a new Dark Age made more sinister, and perhaps more protracted, by the lights of perverted science.” – Winston Churchill