This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

Sometimes, I just don’t know what to say about the current situation anymore. Or rather, I know what to say. I just don’t know if anyone wants to hear it anymore. Yes, we all know. Go sit down. The sky is falling, yes, we all know. Can you believe it? Marge Traitor Greene held a town hall and only one person was tased and only three were arrested. That’s much better than normal! It’s like sitting in a cell and hearing the hammers pounding building your scaffold.

I was listening to the Bloomberg channel. Not to be confused with the Comedy Channel. Just as manufactured as a candy bar for the Mousketeers ears and for entertainment purposes only. No matter what! You keep smiling. Good news and only good news allowed and never break your smile. But they had this muckety muck Hedge fund CEO with more money than God. So, he begins explaining he’s non-political. Then he lays out the darkest doom scenario a creative mind could ever come up with. And then, the host just smiles. Your next stop…The Twilight Zone!

Truths like snowballs against Panzer tanks and the message just doesn’t get through. There were a host of initial public offerings planned on Wall Street, all cancelled. The people on the inside are forecasting a doom worse than a foreign invasion or a deadly plague. Then there was this expert at being an expert on expert things. He called it “Liberation Day!” Kiss my ass and call me Winston Smith. Only the King has called it that! And even he stopped saying it after the markets tanked! “Liberation Day!” The day millions were liberated from their wealth! If they start their speech by calling it “Liberation Day” you know what to expect.

It is at least as fascinating as well as it is terrifying to watch the Captains of Industry and finance screaming running naked with their hair on fire and going completely unnoticed. Meanwhile, in happy Xanax land. They plan for a tea Party with the Red Queen. I’ll show you what I mean. The other day when Wall Street was experiencing one of their “Nature Abhors a Vacuum” rallies. The tide of optimism rose Tesla stock by 3%!

In what drug induced optimism would you ever buy Tesla stock? “Gee! Maybe it will be okay, huh? Maybe they’ll come back!” Only in a drug fueled “Alice in Wonderland” scenario do you see such naïve optimism. The company’s owner has made himself the poster boy for everything people hate going on today. He is the skull and crossbones on the Iodine bottle. This company is as dead as a DeLorean without Michael J. Fox.

The CEO Hedge fund dude explained that some of the King’s goals are noble. See, a Fascist Dictatorship, isn’t all bad! We must cut spending, somehow some way, it’s unsustainable! After fifty years of tax cuts for the wealthy, they are stumped as to what to do now. It seems, there is only one answer they can all agree on. What else could they do in Fantasy Land raise taxes? Off with his head! Here is the funny part. The Republicans already know going in. There aren’t enough hungry children to starve or sick people to kill or Veterans to screw, to pay for the tax cut they have planned for themselves. Living in a fantasy they say, “it’s going to be alright, I guess. The situation will stabilize soon and go back to the way it was!” Wrong, it’s broken forever now.

Like Montezuma fleeing Mexico City. They could leave their gold behind and live. But instead chose to bring their gold along and were weighed down and slaughtered. The King has ripped the foundations of World Trade to its core. But do we still get our tax cut? “Yes!” Well, okay then! It might be the end of the financial world as we have known and cared for the last couple of generations. But as long as we get our tax cut…Okay, we’ll risk it.

Given a choice between doing the right thing and a Financial Armageddon. Republicans in Congress shout, “We want our taxes cut! So, what! We don’t care! We want our taxes cut! Do you hear, are you listening? Tax cut!

If mercy reigned and the King were called home to meet Jesus tonight, it still wouldn’t stop. The King’s extremism and ability to make the Dalai Lama want to punch him out. He has made the world, needless to say, the whole look on at the King’s performance and his unstable goings on. And they begin to say to themselves, “We want no part of that. Maybe the United States with a Fascist Dictator in charge who thinks nothing of breaking the law. Isn’t really a safe haven for our money, after all.

And because those dirty foreigners have listened to the King’s rants about how dirty foreigners are always cheating the United States. They’ve decided to cut us a break and aren’t buying our treasury bills to hide all their money. And so, interest rates will rise for everyone and that’s bad for business. How bad? I don’t know, how long can the King keep talking about conquering Greenland or making Canada the 51^st state? You might find this hard to believe but some people out there think that this kind of talk is as CRAZY as it is untenable.

The King can’t stop being the King. And the show is too tragic not to watch. The King says, “up yours!” to the Supreme Court. Ah, well now. Maybe, I shouldn’t put any money in the United States after all. Maybe it’s not the safe haven it once was anymore under a Fascist Dictator spewing out nonsense. A lunatic without both oars in the water. Subject to cancel any contract or agreement on a whim or a perceived insult.

Maybe we’ll just cancel our orders and go on our merry way. And leave them to their own  financial catastrophe about to befall them. The end of the dollar as the world’s reserve currency. Will that cause an unimaginable economic collapse? But we still get our tax cut, right? “Sure!” Oh boy! “Happy days are here again; the skies are bright and clear again. Let us sing a song of cheer again Happy Days are here again!

“Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”
― Lewis Carroll