By David Glenn Cox
Just how deep do you need to build a nuclear bomb shelter to be effective? I’m asking for a friend. There is a gaff and then there is bizarre but what comes after bizarre? We have witnessed a few word gaffs and thought it was funny and well, it was. Putting peanut butter on a cracker and giving it to the dog funny longing for the days on confefe. But it doesn’t take a dollar store psychologist to see the trend line. Trump gets the briefing on Covid 19 and does nothing. Trump says some in his administration wanted to “ride it out.” No one else in the administration has said anything even remotely close to referencing “riding it out.” So, the only faction in the administration wanting to ride it out was Trump.
A hoax, a plot. Wishes and wanna be’s. Trump launches his new reality series (Now with more Pyongyang!) Covid 19 Task Force. The Emperor’s Court! Where’s Waldo looking for missing faces. Who is in favor and who is unemployed? Open disagreements with the experts on his staff. Pissed off red-faced angry lashing out at the media. Just kicking the dog mocking the handicapped as the walls close in, in a Trump kind of day. The Navy recommended reinstating the captain of the Teddy Roosevelt, I love the smell of insurrection in the morning.
The orange ape man is ringmaster Ned of Bozo’s circus. He introduces the acts but when it comes time to stick his head in the lion’s mouth, he nods to an expert. Taking the softballs fouling off anything difficult. The orange one likes to talk. Fish gotta swim and a huckster gotta talk. It is his weapon and it has a high capacity magazine, a bent sight and a faulty trigger. These things have gone two hours! Premier Stalin has a short address for you.
Their go to defense is throwing up numbers without any point of reference. We’ve shipped twelve million ball point pens and four million of those little kidney shaped bowls you see at doctor’s offices. Four million hemostats and one hundred thousand body bags. Why is it the United States makes up something like four percent of the world’s population and has twenty-five percent of the world’s Covid 19 fatalities?
Magic pills like magic beans, a man looking for miracles. Short attention spans require speed before the impulse fades away. “I’m no doctor; you never know. Hello, Reverend Graham, I have a prayer request.” The reality show star who doesn’t like to deal with reality. Taking all the credit eschewing any responsibility as he moves from scene to scene pulling it out of his butt. Jonathan Winters on the Brown Acid.
Now, the President made an honest suggestion about possibly using light to fight the Corona virus. I’ve seen that treatment used before, but Mr. Spock went blind. The Enterprise and Captain Kirk had been sent to rescue the planet from these critters that looked a lot like rubber dog vomit. Bones figured out that bright light would kill them. This is called, applied knowledge. You can’t get this at Harvard Barack Obama! This is – I saw it on TV once- knowledge. So, The Cheeto is in the orange room of the White House in the big orange lazy boy watching the big screen in his boxers with his Redenbacher on his lap when genius strikes.
“Bones… Spock’s our friend. You’ve got to help him!” You never know, it could work. Have they done any research on that sort of thing? Magic thinking, have they tried Slim Whitman records yet? A guy could wait a hundred years to hear a President of the United States say anything nearly as stupid as using bleach internally. But since this is the Trump Administration you’ll only have to wait until next week. Clearly this is a man desperate for good news even if he has to make it up himself. The Internet exploded with Trump bleach memes and it got all the way back to the orange one. The next day he was petulant dodging questions. Then it was sarcasm as Trump goes into full fantasy mode. Your video tapes are all fake news, let me tell you what really happened.
The White House yesterday sought to move a CNN reporter to the back of the room to punish them for not kissing his ass. The seats are assigned by the press corps and the reporters refused to move, so the Emperor took no questions and stormed from the room. Later, the White House announced they might curtail the corona virus briefings. Someone is holding their breath pouting until they turn blue and stomping their feet. Forgetting he assigned America’s Eddie Haskell, Mike Pence to head up the task force. It was a smooth move to detach himself from the shit show but then the ratings came in.
Reports have said the Trump is anxious to leave the White House. (finally, we agree.) Like millions of Americans he’s anxious to fly to his private golf community and assume the life of the one percent. He’s locked in a big White House with all of these orange problems. He should be naming his horse proconsul any day now probably taking Alex Azar’s job. If you saw this in a movie, you’d want your money back.
A President of the United States ill equipped and ill at ease. Petulant and angry threatening war with Iran throwing hostile words at China. Allowing Russia and Saudi Arabia to create the largest oil crises ever in the history of the world because he avoided the problem. Now, if a casual observer can discern this behavior, the intelligence services of the rest of the world must weep with joy. The bully is a coward who avoids problems at every opportunity. You can do a lot with information like that.
So, just how deep do you need to build a nuclear bomb shelter to be effective? I’m asking for a friend.