Pass Me that Sombrero it’s Time to Dance!

By David Glenn Cox

Well, it’s all out there now like a broken grocery bag on a kitchen floor. The orange one says Bolton is both lying and spreading national security secrets. Of course, it’s easy enough to tell which is which, if the Cheeto is doing something stupid it’s a lie. If the Cheeto is doing something stupid with a foreign leader it’s a national security issue. If the Cheeto says, scum bag journalists should be executed that’s a lie. If the Cheeto tries to make a deal with a dictator to throw Chinese minority groups under the bus that is a national security issue. After all, what are a few concentration camps among friends?

I can see it now, Trumpy asking naively, “what color are your inmates?”

While it is of critical importance to find out just how stupid, the Cheeto is to find his rightful place on the periodic table of elements. Somewhere between gaseous and lead it is also important to understand how school children act when the teacher is out of the room. Suppose your boss likes to recreate that scene from Fantasia where Mickey Mouse dances with a broom. Or suppose your boss; the leader of the free world doesn’t know Great Britain is a nuclear power. Do think anyone will notice if you clock out early? Is there anyone counting the till?

There are only two reasons that someone would work in such an Administration. One, you’re just as stupid as the boss and have that broom polished up and ready for him every afternoon. Or two, you have your eye on a new Perini Navy yacht and a house on the beach in Mexico. In either case, “Wonderful sir, very good. You’re a wonderful dancer sir, but why do you let the broom lead?” You know, I could play just how stupid is the Cheeto all day long. With all sports on hiatus, its like a national past time. Sports bars with the line on Las Vegas odds, 6 to 5 he starts an international incident before the end of the week.

Rearranging the deck chairs and ironing the doilies the floor show offers us comic relief. Robin Williams telling jokes in hell about ice water. Thirty percent of Americans were unable to pay their rent or house payment last month. Here in Colorado that number is between three and five hundred thousand Americans who have too much going on to laugh at the Cheeto’s antics. Hell’s doorman Mitch McConnell, says we should take a wait and see approach to any further stimulus. Let’s wait and see how many marriages break up. Let’s wait and see how many lives are ruined. Let’s wait and see how many children go hungry.

Like a coffee stain on a beige rug you can’t avoid it your eye is irresistibly drawn to it. The Republican skid mark Senate has its eye on police choke holds. Because we all know just how worried Senate Republicans are about Police brutality. As farcical as the comedy White House, they dance around the fire pit chanting “We really care” and then laughing themselves silly.  Drink up, I hear the Russian guns in the distance and then no more dancing and no more laughter. Cast off, we are going to Cozumel!

An aircraft with thirty percent damage won’t fly. A ship with thirty percent damage won’t float. But hell’s doorman says…  “wait and see.” A bank with a thirty percent loan default rate will soon be on the phone to the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation. They won’t be in a hurry to make any more home loans. Not once Wall Street gets wind of the new Katrina brewing in the distance.

People are funny, sometimes the nicest people will do the strangest things when pushed to the edge. I read a news article once from 1932. A Minneapolis grocery store was looted and emptied before police could arrive. One person in the store snatched up their groceries and ran out the door. Those around witnessing this thought, “Good Idea!” A crowd swarmed the store and emptied it. That’s the way society works, if you don’t give a shit about me, I don’t give a shit about you or your laws or your grocery stores or your cops.

Are they asleep at the switch or merely calculating the damage? Can you throw thirty percent of Americans under the bus while making Margaritas? Trump at least has an excuse, “Please excuse Donny from class today, he is a brain-dead moron and cannot participate.” How can the political class of both parties ignore this looming crisis? In an economy 70% dependent on consumer spending how can they ignore one-third of Americans? Republicans in the Senate see the orange Tidy Bowl man caught in the flushing whirlpool and ask themselves if they need any groceries and remind themselves not to forget the sunscreen.

They plan on presenting this mess to the new Democratic Senate majority leader in January. The Senate once so safe and secure for the Republicans is now but a dollop on the horizon slowly sinking into night.  And so, their plan is to grab as many groceries as they can before heading for the beach. A complete abdication of reality an abdication of their duties and responsibilities. They look up the road and say, why not? The Cheeto’s not paying attention. No one they know has lost their job. No one they know will lose their home and their children won’t go hungry. Besides its party time! A going away party for the Cheeto and the Republican Party! Pass me that Sombrero it’s time to dance!