Among the Noble Apes

Falling through the universe at the speed of life

By David Glenn Cox

“Man is the most noble work of God. I wonder who figured that out?” – Mark Twain. It does seem a somewhat partisan opinion with few actual facts to back up the claims. The little ape that could, the tool maker fire starter, weapons maker, assassin. Polluter of worlds, colonizer of innocent’s builder of pyramids and builder of slave ships and the creator of hell. The creator of philosophy and rhetoric watch me use my big brain to solve a problem.  Twenty Centuries and some change and we find ourselves in a minefield of our own creation.

Postmaster LeJoy and Senate Republicans have sussed out our mail problem. It’s the states and their mail in ballots. It is the Corona virus it is everything in the world except the changes they made. The Republican heavy Senate Committee’s idea was to get LeJoy out in front of this thing. Senator Ron Johnson of Wisconsin has it all figured out. Johnson’s theory states that because all of the admitted thousands of complaints sound similar they must be fraudulent. “I’m not getting my mail; I’m not getting my medicine and they just delivered four thousand dead baby chicks to my house.”

You know, when you pay for Broadway you ought to get Broadway not the local little theater version. The Republicans made spurious claims of Postal Service inadequacy after praising the Postal Service employees for their dedication.  They made Grandpa Simpson complaints, “I had to stand in a line! It took me two years to mail a letter. I went to the Post Office one time around lunch time, and they were busy because they let employees go to lunch!”

The two Democrats on the committee asked about documents not produced and phone calls not returned by LeJoy. Mama told me that when people tell lies they tend to blink their eyes a lot. Though not scientific LeJoy was blinking like a strobe light at Studio 54. Postmaster LeJoy was asked specifically, what sort of research have you done to determine the effects of these changes on the American people? Big brain…do your stuff! LeJoy waved a chart explaining that according to the chart delivery would improve! Big brain…sit down! Their research was an  assumption and based on this assumption they implemented changes with negative impacts on millions of Americans threatening the integrity of a national election and to a man the Republicans congratulated him for the fine job he’s doing.

If you try to place where the United States is now historically it is distressing. World War II, the Cold War and the fall of the Berlin Wall. Reagan / Bush with war a go go. Emerging from World War II the most powerful country economically and militarily seventy-five years later our economy is shattered. In 1969 Americans landed men on the moon in 2020 we struggle to deliver mail. Where did it all go wrong? Republican’s complained bitterly and vowed to fight to the death over the extra six-hundred-dollar unemployment benefit. The Republicans don’t understand why they have to pay above the going rate for slaves when there is no market for slaves.

Women and children, seniors, veterans, survival, economic emergency, eviction? Does any of this ring a bell for Republicans? Gee, they all have the same complaint. It must be some Democratic AstroTurf group. The latest estimates for Corona Virus deaths were recently raised from 200,000 to 300,000 before December, can I hear four? Every day we’re told to hang on we a have vaccines we’re studying. A year maybe, hang on. But we already have a cure, stay home wear a mask. “By what right do you violate my freedom by ordering me to wear a mask?” By the same right we order you to wear pants.

It really strains that noble work of God theory. But we have today in the year of the bored 2020 a government of eight-year olds who don’t want to take their medicine. They depend on magic thinking just go ahead go to work, we’ll have that vaccine ready someday. Go ahead and open the schools, it will be alright probably. Republicans pushed to open the economy early despite warnings from the knowledgeable. This brought us to where we are today. Now the Republicans push to open schools with equally disastrous results.

This isn’t higher math that requires chalkboards of mathematical computations. So why do Republicans not care that thousands of Americans will die unnecessarily? Where is that nobility of man? To inflict this on the American people knowingly to cynically judge dead bodies versus stock prices.  To abandon twenty million breadwinners and their families to destitution as they lecture us about family values. I’m genuinely stumped, I don’t see the end game. What is the upside of this Kamikaze policy? It is enough not to care about the welfare of the people. But nothing in Washington happens by accident, this is the orchestrated policy of the United States government to march like lemmings headed for the cliffs, but why?

At this point the only thing the United States leads the world in are nuclear weapons and buffoonery. Germany recently increased stimulus payments to the unemployed. The chairman of the Minneapolis Federal Reserve warned if you don’t get busy with stimulus you’re headed for the rocks. The information is out there could they really be that stupid? Or is this the final solution?

The Mitch McConnell plan says cities and states file for bankruptcy which means payments on government loans end. Government bonds turn into monopoly money. Wall Street turns into a Hormel meat packing plant. Millions of homeless on the streets but the US will be rid of Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid and the National debt. Don’t blame us! We didn’t do it the states did it…because of the pandemic…it couldn’t be helped. The foreign nations who hold our debt obligations would be less than pleased. They would respond with a rout on world markets trying to get ten cents on the dollar. But bankruptcy is not so scary if you still own the bakery. Would the dollar still be the world’s reserve currency after a collapse of American markets?

It is a fatalistic scenario any way you slice it, either World Depression, World War or both. Is it intentional or is it the epitome of stupid among the noble apes?

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