“Hello 2016, I’m so glad I’m here!”

Falling through the universe at the speed of life

By David Glenn Cox

Sometimes I think we’re all cracking up. I know, I feel like I am sometimes. You’ve probably seen the picture of the Miami cop wearing a Trump “No more Bullshit” facemask through the Miami Justice Center. The officer has obviously passed intelligence minimums for the department. He has to understand at some level that this is offensive. So, does the officer behave this is a way to promote his candidate or offend his opponents? It makes a big difference. I can understand being stupid that’s only human. But to work for a city or a municipality and to collect a city check and think that you can walk the streets in OUR uniform willfully offending us?

Surely, they have meetings in the department and discuss the issues of the day. In a day and time when police organizations are being closely scrutinized by the public you would think someone would have posted a bulletin. Obviously, this officer has no respect for his uniform, his co-workers, or his chief. His personal beliefs are on a higher plane than the organization he represents professionally. Wearing campaign regalia is illegal in a polling place. If a polling clerk knows that a cop outta know it too. I’ve turned voters around wearing campaign tee shirts, “Go in the rest room and turn it inside out.” Buttons go into the pocket and hats are taken off.

This is a scared circle, campaigning ends fifty feet from the front door. The campaign is over, cast your vote.

Several have reported that the bearings are beginning to overheat on the Trumpy train. This orange opportunist has opened new campaign offensives against Dr. Fauci, CNN and Leslie Stahl. In his free time, he sometimes speaks of a Joe Biden, whoever he is? Saddle up Rocinante! Tonight, we storm the ramparts of CBS! President Jeepers Creepers said the one-hour “60 Minutes” interview was biased and unfair after forty-five minutes and refused to take part in the final segment. You know? After you’ve spent, god knows how much money on Rudy Giuliani, and he comes back from Ukraine with a flimsy, cock and bull story about a blind man and Hunter Biden’s laptop in an envelope postmarked Moscow. A story so flimsy that even Faux News won’t touch it and they make stuff up! Time to fall back on the old standards. “They’re picking on me!”

Trumpy desperate for a victory sets up strawmen easy to knock over. “Yeah, Dr. Fauci is five hundred years old and we only keep him around here for shits and giggles and when the cat throws up.” Trumpy is angry he wants to fight the little wars he has the power to win. While avoiding the big confrontation ahead at Biden grad. Trumpy the executive time President is busier than a one-armed paper hanger trying to make up with volume what he lacks in substance. Did you learn anything at the Trump rally? An oxymoron.

After four years and in the face of a deadly pandemic. How many “Just curious” voters are attending the Trumpy show? Completely in denial about a pandemic clearly on the rise Trumpy clicks his heels together three times, “There’s no place like home!” He is Norma Desmond replaying the highlight reel of his glory days. “They love me! They really love me!” Texas Senator John Cornyn always said he loved Trumpy. Now in a tough election fight Cornyn said he split with Donald Trump several years ago but didn’t tell anyone. Strangely, Herman Goering told the Nuremberg Court the same thing, “What Nazi? I was never a Nazi! Oh, I broke with that Hitler fellow years ago. I just forgot to mention it.” Cornyn said he loved Trumpy but really, he just wanted to rent his car.

We have finally reached Biblical proportions plagues, locusts and hurricanes. Noted Religious Charlatan Pat Robertson, Says Trump will win the election, but the Earth will be struck soon after by a meteor. That Pat! Always with the happy endings. If Trumpy were reelected, I’d welcome the meteor, but I haven’t bought my meteor party supplies just yet. Like a lot of us, I think Trumpy’s cracking up.

Trumpy wants his bought and paid for Attorney General to bring charges against his opponents when there are no charges. Said President then threatens Attorney General with removal if he doesn’t find some charges. But it’s just his two o’clock rant and he’s forgotten it by five after he’s had his cookies and Bosco. He’s got to get ready for the next super spreader event where he rides the sky cycle across Snake River Canyon. “Hello 2016, I’m so glad I’m here!”

Anything but Covid-19 “We’ll have a vaccine by Tuesday and the whole world vaccinated by Thursday afternoon.” I hope Trumpy understands about turning corners on the virus. After we’ve turned the corner three times, we find ourselves back where we started. Nearly eight months later and we’re doing worse? We’ve spent all this money to do worse?

Then one day a beam of light shot down from heaven. A light fell around his orangeness a voice from above said, “You want a bigger stimulus too! Even bigger than Nancy Pelosi’s stimulus package.” Yes lord, even bigger than Nancy’s then they will love me again. I can make my comeback! But Mitch McConnell let the tiki torch fuel out of his lamp real quick. “Now Mr. President, we agreed on a nice round number and that number is zero. You don’t get any rounder than zero.

There was a time when Mitch liked to say, “How high sir?” Now a days, Mitch wastes no time telling Trumpy, “Shove off Orangey, before I give you something to cry about.” Every rat for himself! Abandon ship! Take lots of pictures and take notes you might be asked about it someday, “Grandpa, what was a Republican?”

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