By David Glenn Cox
There is a general irony here. The same GSA official who releases funds and office space for the President Elect also provides money for the outgoing staff to box up papers and hire warehouse space. Once the money is released, the incoming administration will make travel and security arrangements for the outgoing administration. In the past, that’s never been an issue as both sides have always worked together. “Ivanka, here’s your ticket on Southwest. Don’t forget to be at the airport at least two hours early. Mr. President, you’re going to have this whole big Greyhound bus all to yourself. Mira Lago is only ten hours away.
“Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.”
― John F. Kennedy
Alright, everyone get out a pencil. The President defeated has every right to pursue every avenue for an elective victory. He should fight down to the last alcoholic Mayor and last weed eater at the last landscaping supply company. But there is a caveat to tap dancing on the cliff at midnight, once legal means come to an end you must concede the race. To do otherwise is sedition. A crime punishable by life in prison. Criminal Attorney General Wrenfield, as played tonight by Bill Barr rushes slovenly to defend his orange criminal master as career members of the Justice Department resign. Diving off the burning trash barge overwhelmed by the stench.
As Trumpy holds his blood purge firing everyone with a vowel in their name there is no chance to get anyone but underlings to replace them. Defend the Fuhrer bunker or work on your Resume’ quickly. Four out of five employment experts agree; participating in a coup de tat has a negative impact on any future employment opportunities. “Hi, wanna be Defense Secretary for a couple of weeks?” And what are your job goals working here on the Hindenburg? As a deck hand on the “Lost Dutchman”, what did you do each day? Trump fighting for Trump, sending the Hitler youth to die senselessly to protect the Fuhrer bunker for one more day. Can you explain this four-year gap in your employment history?
Not since “The Royal None Such” has there been such a shit show. Tis all part of the Con-man game. What do you do when the marks are on to you? Do you talk them down or do you run for it? Time for one last bluff, one last crime. So anxious for battle he will charge into Gallipoli unprepared fighting down to the last career official. But as legal mirages vanish criminal opportunities fester. Conspiracy charges don’t require you to know of the conspiracy. Just clocking in could earn you five years because your boss is Donald Trump or Bill Barr, and they would never do anything like that. “They said they liked me, said theys gonna take me to Argentina with them.”
Trumpy’s been wetting his pants trying to get Obamacare in front of the Extreme Court for years. “And the Judges said, “Nope, wouldn’t touch it with a ten-foot pole.” They kicked the can down the road to send the orange abomination a message, “If you’re looking for help over here…keep looking.” If they wouldn’t touch Obamacare, they aren’t about to overturn a Presidential election over trifles. In every Coup de tat, there is the moment of reveal when you must declare unequivalently which side you are on. Then a card laid is a card played. Somebodies got to be the jail dummy. Trump might not go to jail, but Corey and Trevor most certainly will. And we pick you!
Let’s see; you got Rudy Giuliani and Lindsey Graham on your side, but Mitch McConnell eulogizes fired Defense Secretary Mark Esper on the Senate floor as he would his own son. Is Hell a house divided? “I fired him, now you’re supposed to like it!” Are there two devils fighting for control? Devil one, orange, outrageous and portly. Just lost an election with 99.5 % chance of being removed from office. And now comes Devil number two, a backwoods mob boss with an irrepressible thirst for power and turtle wax. Who just this minute won reelection for another six-year term. So, devil number one says to devil number two, “Come on and help me overturn the election.” Devil number two answers, “You want me to risk my power to save yours, but what do I get?” Trumpy has nothing to offer but a dead end. Better for McConnell to wish Mr. What’s his name, all the best in his future endeavors. Thanks’ for playing, here are some lovely parting gifts. Tell them what they have won Johnny Olsen!
Next stop Nixon precedent, population one. Nixon lost fair and square. Gotcha red-handed. He resigned and was allowed to go home. He kept his wealth. He kept his pension and his health care and was not prosecuted, a really a good deal considering the alternatives. Under the RICO statutes assets earned through criminal endeavor can be seized. That means certain hotels financed by Russian mafia money could be subject to seizure by federal officials. If the orange usurper were ever to be declared a criminal.
The word Mortgage means “Dead pledge,” It is a zombie that only comes to life if you default on your loan. Likewise, there is a mortgage on the White House. A zombie pledge to follow the established rules of our government. The instant, the second Trumpy does otherwise a lightening bolt strikes from Mount Olympus creating an immediate Constitutional crisis. The former President would be a criminal behaving in a criminal manner. All bets are off, the zombie comes to life and all courtesies are revoked. No pension, no Library, no Nixon precedent.
Trumpy’s long shot bet on a three-legged nag blind in one eye and can’t see out of the other with a three-hundred-pound orange jockey riding hard coming round the backstretch. It’s “Jail Time” by a nose and only a week behind the winner.