By David Glenn Cox
It is official again; Joe Biden is President Elect. President Elect Biden made remarks after the Electoral College count was official. It became clear to me as a political satirist that the next four years are going to be difficult. Calm, clear reasoned approaches. Planning and competency all spell trouble. Joe Biden’s remarks were pointed angry and conciliary. He vented his anger at seditious Republicans and made it clear that if they do not desist, they are about to make a very powerful enemy. “You’ve played your little game and had your fun,” but for the good of the country knock it off.
Patriotism, urgency, compassion the President Elect touched on them all. How odd it has become to hear a President talk about other people’s problems. To hear a President Elect talk about grief to the surviving heirs of the 300,000 lost and expressing concern for the millions financially suffering. In in a way it reminded me of FDR’s fireside chats. Brief speeches designed to communicate a single message and reassure the public that someone was in charge and minding the store. The President Elect should lean on this to counter the Republican propaganda networks. Joe Biden does a particularly good sane. I’d let him drive my car to the store.
Anyone remember Trumpy’s Physician, Doctor Haight Ashbury? The one who wrote glowingly about Trump’s morbidly obese health and his good genes who might live to be two hundred years old? Bill Barr’s resignation letter reads the same only worse.
“I am greatly honored that you called on me to serve your administration and the American people once again as Attorney General. I am proud to have played a role in the many successes and unprecedented achievements you have delivered for the American people. Your 2016 victory speech in which you reached out to your opponents and called for working together for the benefit of the American people was immediately met by a partisan onslaught against you in which no tactic, no matter how abusive and deceitful, was out of bounds. The nadir of this campaign was the effort to cripple, if not oust, your administration with frenzied and baseless accusations of collusion with Russia.”
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. (Star Wars Theme) Complete Sharpie generated fantasy except for nadir. Trump would never use a word like nadir it sounds too much like an SAT vocabulary question. After becoming the most cringing and servile Attorney General in American history. Trumpy writes Barr’s suicide note for him apologizing for not being servile and cringing enough.
“Few could have weathered these attacks, much less forge ahead with a positive program for the country. You built the strongest and most resilient economy in American history – one that has brought unprecedented progress to those previously left out. You have restored American military strength. By brokering historic peace deals in the Mideast, you have achieved what most thought impossible. You have curbed illegal immigration and enhanced the security of our nation’s borders. You have advanced the rule of law by appointing a record number of judges committed to constitutional principles. With Operation Warp Speed, you delivered a vaccine for coronavirus on a schedule no one thought conceivable – a feat that will undoubtedly save millions of lives.”
You alone are our fearless leader! And I have failed you master! Forgive me! Where did I put that Samurai sword? It sounds a lot like a North Korean suicide form letter the type inmates sign five minutes before they are executed. The contrast couldn’t be more striking, Bill Barr asking for forgiveness for failing Trump but not a word for the United States of America. P.S. “I’m sorry I ratted you out by saying the election was legit.”
The President Deposed is upset because Barr didn’t use Hunter Biden’s taxes to bludgeon the election. Wait, I made myself a promise. Traditionally, the President Elect has a honeymoon period. I told myself I would give the President Elect a respectable chance. Faux News however determined five minutes to be honeymoon enough leading with the Hunter Biden tax investigation. Oblivious that Hunter Biden is a grown ass man, and his daddy isn’t responsible for son’s tax return.
Get ready cause here it comes, you can’t pet a dog that wants to bite you. Despite Orange Trumpy’s decade long tax audit and tax investigations “Our top story tonight, son of President Elect and not a government employee with no connection to the government in any way other than familial is under investigation in a clearly orchestrated political hit.” Who knows, maybe Barr had it planned as a Christmas surprise for Trump ruined by the election.
Joe Biden is going to Georgia to campaign in the Senate runoffs and I almost wish that he wouldn’t. Trumpy has got those rednecks so pissed-off they don’t know whether to shit or ride a bicycle. I hate to see anything that might distract them from tearing the Republican Party apart limb from limb. Kelly Loeffler was so worried she went for an old Georgia standard of getting her picture taken with a Ku Klux Klan leader. One of the oldest tricks in the book down South. Those who know who he is will quietly smile, and when called on the carpet the candidate puts their index finger in their cheek and says, “Gee, is that who that was? My star’s if only I’d known.” What was it that Bill Barr was saying? “In which no tactic, no matter how abusive and deceitful, was out of bounds.”
All I’m saying is if the Republicans want to kill each other burn each other’s farms and start a Civil War in their Party and play with guns in the woods, we shouldn’t distract them from their goals until after the runoff. You don’t need Joe Biden when the bitch just got her picture taken with a Ku Klux Klan leader. What more do you need to know? In Georgia, that means something. How can the President Elect top that but to distract from it?