Teach Your Children

Falling through the universe at the speed of life

By David Glenn Cox

I remember Richard Nixon waving from the door of the helicopter. I was thinking to myself that the system had worked. The President of the United States had resigned his office after meeting with Republican Senators. They explained that if it came to a vote, Nixon would lose. It was comforting to think that the President couldn’t get away with murder, that there were at least some restraints placed on them. I was thinking about those Republicans going to the oval office to deliver the two-ton block of ice to Dick. There was a line, a limit of toleration that dare not be crossed and Nixon had crossed it.

Nixon was a criminal and it was right and proper that he be removed from office. It served as a moral lesson to a generation and considering current events I feel sad for Nixon. Nixon deserved what he got and got off easy at that. But in the pantheon of criminals, they wouldn’t let Nixon go beyond the visitor’s lobby. He would never be allowed up the grand staircase into the throne room of Donald Trump. Nixon’s crimes today couldn’t raise an eyebrow. “You say the President’s reelection campaign hired burglars to break into an opponent’s campaign office to collect information. They were caught and the campaign began to pay out hush money. How many died?” None.

If I had been Trumpzilla’s attorney, I think I might have handled the case differently and would have certainly got my money up front. Their defense: The Senate doesn’t have jurisdiction and/or a question of free speech. If you honestly believe those things to be true. Why not just say so and be done? FDR once said, “Be sincere, be brief, be seated.” My client believes this court has no jurisdiction, and the charge against him relates directly to my client’s first Amendment Right of Free speech. Thank you.” If you actually believe it to be true, why not litigate it?

Instead, Rowan & Martin take us on a fun filled thirty minute explanation of the word fight. It was so reminiscent of “It depends on what your definition of is, is?” Kudo’s to the poor intern who spliced together every clip from every Democrat who ever said the word fight in the past quarter century, but they missed the point. The question of one’s speech inciting an insurrection is simple, was there an insurrection after you spoke? Of all of the thousand of clips of all those Democrats telling voters to fight! Fight! Fight! Were there any riots or property damage? Were the police called? Was anyone killed or injured while fighting breast cancer?

When you have no defense, it is best to leave it there. Making up a phony defense only makes you look more guilty in the long run. Outrage is a trial lawyers’ best friend and when your client is the world’s largest victim and largest consumer of pampers express outrage and play the victim defense. “My client couldn’t be guilty, here’s a picture of criminals forming at the Capitol even before the President had finished his speech.” And here’s a picture of Heinz Guderian about to lead a panzer army into Poland, even before Hitler finished his speech! A huge mob and the defense want to break it down into good people and bad people. These people, who committed these crimes, are criminals, we don’t know any of them. We only know the good people who didn’t commit crimes.

There is an old adage which says, “Never talk about rope in the house of a man who’d been hanged.” I do hope he cashes that check quickly. The defense team, yes, the defense team rolls tape of Trumpy explaining himself after Charlottesville. His “good people on both sides” remarks. Too bad Jeffery Epstein is dead, you could have called him as a character witness or perhaps Vladimir Putin would like to defend you. Oh, too much defense makes my brain hurt.  To play these extend clips to kill time and call it a defense. “Because the house managers clearly doctored this tape, so let’s just watch this extend version of the President’s remarks defending White Supremacists and see how much more my client clearly incriminates himself. And here is a photo of him golfing with Saddam Hussein. And in this one he’s kicking a puppy.”

Lucky for Trump the trial is fixed, or he’d be a goner. If Vinnie’s cousin had had this legal representation, he would have ridden the lightening to Valhalla Buick or no Buick. His legal team actually made Trumpy look worse than if they had refused to participate and just sat mute with their hands folded on the desk. You can’t be forced to testify against yourself, but the innocent usually can’t wait to testify. I was in a court case about a car accident and the first words out of the judge’s mouth was, “Who has pictures?” I put my hand up. I knew those pictures would show my innocence, and I couldn’t wait to show them off. My opponent had no photos only an-inch-thick stack of bills she wanted me to pay. The judge asked her, “You’re here about a car accident, and you didn’t bring me a picture of your car?”

She then began her stirring explanation complete with pigs flying carrying leatherette briefcases. Angles of the sun and the collision geometry during a leap year. She could have saved her breath as soon as she said she didn’t have photos she was done. The judge saw through her like a store front window.  She had all kinds of documentation with invoices and estimates, but refused to show him a picture. She wanted to paint him a picture. If you look at it just right and squint a little bit and ignore the full picture, you can see I’m in the right.

Laurel & Hardy did Trumpy no favors yesterday, attempting to re-introduce him to the public like a stranger we’ve never met before. “My client Charles Manson, has been accused of some horrible crimes. But do we ever stop to consider the real Charles? The Charles who helps the neighbor kids fix their bikes or the Charles Manson who helps little old ladies across the street? “

The Trumpy team could have saved them and us from this awful spectacle. If your case is no jurisdiction and freedom of speech, why all the theatrics? Why parcel everything out? These guys at this time and we don’t know those guys or this guy. A new generational lesson, there are no limits and there are no boundaries. The fact that their defense was no defense, and yet they proceeded to tack up scenery and create a three-act play. Attempting to illustrate Trump’s innocence while only assisting in his prosecution. There is a line, a limit of toleration that dare not be crossed and Trumpy has crossed it and the Republicans will vote to let him walk. And so, the only crimes worse than Trump’s become their own.

This is what we teach your children about America.

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