First Came Amos and Andy

Falling through the universe at the speed of life

By David Glenn Cox

Sometimes reading the news is like waking up in a black and white Twilight Zone episode. As you read the headlines. Galileo Found Guilty of Heresy on All Charges! Galileo claimed the planets revolved around the sun. The Pope said, “No they don’t.” Galileo answered, “Have you looked?” And the Pope sentenced him to house arrest for the rest of his life. There that proves it, Galileo was wrong. In Southlake, Texas, a lovely little berg just down the road a piece outside of Dallas about maybe four or five hundred years ago. Local townsfolk were outraged by a racial sensitivity and diversity plan being taught at their 98% White High School.

In a crowded field the anti-Galileoist’s walked away triumphant in local school board elections. Tolerance and inclusion will no longer be taught in Southlake schools. It was an invasion from another world. Little green Liberals trying to take over our children pushing their Anti-Christian Marxist agenda! The parents offer, “If you teach White children, they are no better than other children that is anti-White discrimination. We prefer you teach our children the Earth is the center of the universe. If you teach that Gay and Trans people should be accepted and not killed or terrorized, that goes against our Old Testament religious beliefs because Jesus said, Well, he might not have said anything, but he was against it and shellfish and working on the Sabbath too!

Welcome to Southlake – Please don’t mention the outside world. With an average income over a quarter million dollars, Southlake is what would happen if thirty thousand rednecks all won the lottery at the same time. Ferraris and exotic sports cars parked in front of mobile homes with white columns.  Brown yardmen cutting the grass around the rusting broke down Monte Carlo in the front yard for several years now. “Now class if you’ll open your history book to page seven. “Native Americans joyously receive Christopher Columbus.” Columbus brought manufactured goods and the word of god to the savages in the New World, but were they grateful?”

It was Henry Ford who invented the autocycle. And we have to buy a new car every eighteen months just to show the neighbors we make more money than they do. Cutting taxes for the rich will help prosperity to trickle down to everybody. Your homework is to do the math problems at the end of the chapter, but problems 15 through 20 have been declared to be heresy and a conjuring of the devil with numbers by the county school board. Don’t do problems 15 through 20, or you will be sentenced to a lake of fire and damnation to burn forever.

If you underpay your work force with a brutal minimum wage, how much can they receive in public assistance?

Jim’s Country Club dues are $400 per month while Joe’s Country Club dues are only $350 per month. How much does it cost to keep minorities out of both Country Clubs each month?

If we don’t teach it! It’s not true! You can’t make us teach evolution or tolerance or the law of gravity. We want to believe what we want to believe even if our children suffer for it. Even if the kids look like bumpkins when they leave here, we like it that way! Sure, our kids were caught on national television chanting the N-word but that doesn’t mean they’re racist…yet. Just affluent White Kids being clueless affluent White kids. They don’t know any better because no one ever taught them any better. And if we have our way about it, no one ever will.

Also, in this tattered tapestry of Republican rhetoric and misaligned church views the state of Wyoming has established a fund to defend coal. Coal is big business in Wyoming but is getting smaller all the time. Natural gas, solar and wind energy have eaten 40% of the market in the last few years. World markets are turning away from coal for obvious environmental reasons. But the Wyoming legislature has a plan. Sue! Sue everybody and sue anybody who tries to interfere in the coal business. The state of Washington recently turned down a permit for a coal terminal on the Columbia River. Wyoming was ready to sue, “This sounds like a job for Coal Man! And his faithful Indian companion servant, Paralegal.”

Unfortunately, the company wanting to build the coal terminal went out of business. Because everyone knows that the days of coal are over and are not coming back no matter how many lawyers you hire, or school boards change the curriculum. It is the gas company suing Edison over the electric light or the railroads suing the Wright Brothers. The desire to suspend time and declare perpetual Good Ole Days!

We the undersigned concerned parents don’t want our children to be taught any scientific theories which may interfere with their religious training. We understand and accept that this may impair their future educational opportunities and leave them shallow and uniformed. But we want our children only to be taught the things which we believe. We don’t want them indoctrinated with any left wing propaganda about the Civil War or Jim Crow. Why do you want to go around stirring up trouble reminding our children of the nasty things our parents and their parents did?

First came Amos and Andy then Martin Luther King and finally Barack Obama. What else do you need to know? That’s the story, White people got to this continent and found nothing, nothing but a few wretched Native Americans grateful for being saved from heathenry. Abe Lincoln founded the first automobile company and named it after himself.  Coal is making a big comeback and Galileo has been convicted on all charges. The Pope proves conclusively the Earth is the center of the universe. Tonight, on Faux, Tucker and his guest will discuss the constitutional underpinnings for the law of gravity.

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