Mission Accomplished

Falling through the universe at the speed of life

By David Glenn Cox

I feel like “they” should have known. The mythical “they” any sub-set not including myself, where I can question without accusation. The Black Death came in waves across Europe. The plague wasn’t just a few months; it was years. I have to take an uneducated guess here and say that there were probably delta variants of the Black Death. Years when the plague was more lethal than others, when conditions were just right for the fleas to bite you on your ass and say goodnight.

Scientist’s being scientists, are taught from an early age not to assume anything. To follow the data and ignore needless trivia like, “these things always come in waves.” They look up from the microscope and say, “Yeah, I know that.” But didn’t think it was knowledge important enough, to share with the rest of us. Perhaps out of  self-preservation, some unwise physician back in our early days of pandemic night and shade. “Oh, my yes, this could rock on for years! These things are rarely a one off!”

History isn’t the past; it’s the future before you were born. After the assassination of Austrian Archduke Ferdinand, the Austrian officials were as you can imagine, were rightfully upset. They wanted war, but they didn’t want to appear too obvious about it. The Austrians told the Bosnian Serbs in the form of an ultimatum, “We are going to investigate this crime with our people in your country. We will use our laws, not yours. We will go wherever the hell we want to go and arrest whomever the hell, we please. And if you don’t like that…too bad.

This was the same ultimatum we gave the Taliban in Afghanistan. Knock the old wax seals off the document and replace the faded ribbons in our fabled hunt for a CIA agent gone rogue. Hiding high up somewhere in the mountains. Either holed up in a primitive cave complex with a dialysis machine or living comfortably in Pakistan. But we didn’t want to invade Pakistan! We wanted to invade Afghanistan, and it’s gonna be so easy. So, the US pokes the Taliban in the chest and says, “Cough him up Dude, or else!”

George W. Bush, being the affable, good-hearted fellow he was, had promised the Pakistanis a brand-new wing of F-18 fighter jets. Free! No obligation, nothing else to buy. Cancel anytime! The Pakistanis are in the unenviable position of straddling the fence between the Western world and the Eastern world. Between the Christian world and the Islamic world, between the secular world and Islamic Jihad. That’s why George of the Jungle was trying to lure them into being friendly…”We’ll give you stuff for free!”

Anyway, long story short. Mr. Obama, cancelled those F-18 fighter jets. After the Pakistanis had already picked out names for them assigned them parking spaces and everything. And then the bad news, “Christmas is canceled, Santa ain’t coming kids. The Grinch cancelled it!” The Pakistani’s being pragmatic said to themselves, “How can we get those fighter jets and save Christmas?”

“Psst, Hey you! If I were to have this friend, see. And this friend of mine, he had some information that you would like to know about. Well, my friend he wants to know, if he were to give you some of this information, that you’d really (trust me!) really would like to know. Do you think you could get us those fighter jets coming, like you promised?”

CNN – Breaking News! A raid was conducted on a complex in Pakistan believed to be the hiding place of you know who! Information discovered by the CIA, led them to raid this complex in a Pakistani residential neighborhood. Pakistani officials are said to be very angry about the violation of their airspace, and overjoyed by the addition to their air force. “Oh heavens, they have violated our airspace! What shall we do? We must appear to be angry, so they don’t suspect that we sold the old boy out by the pound. What shall we do? Maybe gas up one of our new fighter planes and go for a ride! Maybe fly over to the Indian border and see if we can make someone jealous.”

They should have known better, but their hubris blinded them. It’s astounding the way it works, the Japanese based their entire World War II strategy on, “after Pearl Harbor, the US fleet will sail out to fight one titanic naval battle, which we will win!” The question, what if they don’t, was never asked. The same, “A Southern gentleman can lick ten Yankees! Your Bushido training will allow you to defeat decadent Yankees. Look Maw, I’m flying my attack helicopter that costs more than a high school. And I’m shootin at folks living in mud huts! Boy, are they stupid! We got a satellite fix on them. So, I used my GPS to navigate to the target. And then I dropped several schoolteachers’ annual salaries in munitions on the insurgents. Showed the fuck out them, and blew that mud hut to smithereens!

The UN charter says, you can’t invade a nation install a puppet government and then hold a referendum on whether you can stay or not. Which is exactly what the US did in Afghanistan. When we do it, we are promoting Democracy. When others do it, they are just brutal dictators holding sham elections.

The Project for the New American Century said the US needed to prove its military dominance by fighting two, count them, two major theater wars. Fighting those two wars was their “core mission.” They called the  American military, “The cavalry on the new American frontier.” I was at a tea party the other day at the Twelve Oaks plantation. I was telling Gerald O’Hara the very same thing. Our Confederate Regiment is the new cavalry on the American frontier.

Okay, here’s the battle plan. We gonna drop bombs and shoot missiles, till you can see the back wall of the warehouse. We are going blow the shit out everything with retail value over twenty dollars. Then after we destroy the phone exchanges, water works and electrical facilities. We will stand back benevolently and ask, “well, what do you think? Pretty damn impressive, huh?”

 “What if it doesn’t work?”

Doesn’t work! What are you talking about? You’re just being fractious now! Of course, it will work! Look at all those bombs, missiles and look at all those airplanes and helicopters!

 The US must ‘discourage advanced industrial nations from challenging our leadership or even aspiring to a larger regional or global role.’ – Paul Wolfowitz

The United States did not lose the Afghan War. They never won it in the first place. They shooed the flies away from the picnic table and assumed they’d taught those flies a good hard lesson. Joe Biden didn’t lose the war and neither did little man Twump. The war was lost by George W. Bush and company, on the very same day they started it.

Mission Accomplished

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