By a Wide Majority

Falling through the universe at the speed of life

By David Glenn Cox

I am not an optimist and feel uncomfortable in the role. I just don’t like scare journalism. In radio class, I was taught back in those early radio days that CBS, had been called the Voice of Gloom. While NBC radio, was known for its journalistic tone as the Voice of Doom. Early broadcast strategies of peddling fear to make them tune in to listen more. Replaced by a more sophisticated, but still of same structure dead white girl news. I don’t do murder. It is the ultimate violation of humanity. Let’s all watch! Tonight, on CSI! Tell us all the grisly, ghastly details of someone’s horror story.

It exists, ergo it must work. It’s counter intuitive, that if you call five hundred million people and bug the living shit out of them on their cell phones every day. That eventually, they will buy an auto warranty from you. It makes no sense to me, but it must work or they would stop calling. “Gee, maybe I Do need an auto warranty.” While we are on the subject, it is a Warranty, not an insurance policy. They pay for things that break, not for things that are broken. If you think they’re gonna replace your engine, after your ex-girlfriend gets drunk, and puts sugar in your gas tank or you go 80,000 miles between oil changes. Like I said, I’m not an optimist.

Emotional manipulation 101 (Big Brother is here. You just can’t see him.) It works, but it only works, if the story that you’re selling, is worse than the story the audience is living. My mother grew up hard during the Great Depression, in a single parent, then no parent household. And she didn’t like Shirley Temple movies worth a damn. In all the Shirley Temple movies, Shirley was rescued from poverty, by an airplane pilot or a ship captain or a cowboy. My mother thought her movies were fucking bullshit because no one had rescued her. Shirley Temple movies were about people in hard times, and a dancing little kid was supposed to cheer them up some. And it worked fine, unless you were a similar little kid, living in poverty.

Herbert Hoover was dwarfed by the Great Depression. They didn’t know how to respond. But their Republican instincts, told them that if they did nothing, they couldn’t be blamed for it. So, the Administration along with friendly newspaper editors, decided to just talk it down. “Nobody is that  hungry, it’ll be fine. Be over any day now. Two chickens in every garage! You can eat moral fiber! Fiber is good for you!”

Food riots were written up as red agitators and Rent Strikes were inspired by suspected Communists. You had better trust the government to us Republicans; there might be a Communist under your bed! But no matter how long the announcers spoke, or how long the editors wrote. They could not convince hungry Americans, that it wasn’t all that bad.

It was the greatest political wipeout out in American history. The Democrats won the White House, the Seante and held a super majority in the House. It was 200 days that changed America for the better, forever. The Republicans for their part screamed, “They’re all Communists! It’s all Communism! Sure, it all starts innocently enough with public drinking fountains, but it all ends in the Gulag, Comrade Pinko!”

“Red this and red that. I don’t even know what a red looks like.” – Tom Joad

Former Vice President Dan Qayle’s family was big into the newspaper biz. And you probably thought he rose to high office by talent alone perhaps? Dan was a welder in The Indiana National Guard, but was unable to strike an arc in civilian life. So, Dan made fine living working for Grandpa. While other boys were out goofing off in Vietnam, Dan was sweating out in Indianapolis, sticking metal together with electricity on the weekends.

But when the family owns a string of newspapers and has millions of dollars getting dusty sitting in the cupboard. Higher office is always the next step. Sent to the finest schools and Universities, with never a thought about tuition or eating regularly. “Student loan…what’s that?” Mitt Romney was forced to live in a basement apartment, when he was in school. A 3,000 square foot basement apartment, in a building his dad owned in New York City. And yet, somehow, he survived! But they performed the full Monty for Dan, they had high hopes, maybe someday… President Dumbass!

No matter how they danced and how they pranced, America questioned Dan Quayle intellect. He came across as Ritchie Rich, sitting in on the board of directors meeting in a company his dad owned. The question of intellect was settled once and for all, after Quayle got in snit, after having his spelling corrected. Harry Truman would have laughed it off, “Well, I guess, it’s a long-time since I’ve been in a schoolhouse.” JFK would have quipped, “Unfortunately, I’m forced to make do with a Harvard education.” But Dan wanted to make the point that he was right, and they were wrong. When he wasn’t right and America saw  a petulant spoiled child, throwing a tantrum, trying to get his way.

I’ve read the dark foreboding story about the Republicans plan to attempt to gerrymander Texas. “News Flash!” But I’ve known women who attended the Babtist Church every Sunday and prayer meetings on Wednesday night, that were also prochoice. Though they themselves, would never ever, consider an abortion for themselves. They are not so blinded by a book, not to understand the taking away of a right, a right which only affects other women.

It’s not a popular opinion in church, so they don’t broadcast it. They only bring it out only in the voting booth. The lack of rape or incest protections is a slap in the face, the Republicans screaming from the roof top, “We don’t actually give a shit about you!” Hell, hath no fury brother, most of those women remember, how the world was, before Roe vs. Wade.

Gonna gerrymander me some Texas, just as soon this here plague lets up! But unvaccinated Republicans, are making it difficult to forecast the future Republican population. What with them dying by the thousands. In Texas, everything is bigger! When the power goes out, it stays out for days! While you shiver in the rec room maybe now, would be a good time to strike a match and review those statewide candidates.

When the power goes out for three days, that’s three days the factory ain’t running. Three days that workers didn’t get paid for. They’ll will remember in November. If the forget, Ted Cruz is going to remind them arguing to not raising the debt ceiling and letting the economy collapse. That will show you Joe Biden! Millions of Americans will be unemployed, homeless and starving! I guess we sure showed you, you son of a bitch!

By a wide majority, Americans favor Joe Biden’s infrastructure package. Republicans oppose. By wide majority, Americans feel a women’s reproductive rights should be left alone. Republicans oppose. (Fun Trivia Fact: Women make up more than 50% of the voting public.) By a wide majority, Americans are demanding action on climate change. Republicans oppose. “V-8’s for everyone and cut off those damn catalytic converters!”

Ba wide majority, Americans blame the unvaccinated, for the pandemic. Republicans oppose. There is a damn good reason not mentioned in the dark foreboding article for the Republican plot to gerrymander Texas. Like Marie Antoinette, the Republicans see the blade a coming. It is hard to remain in office after pissing everyone off. It’s hard to gerrymander a district, after all the Republicans have disappeared.

“The dictators of the world say that if you tell a lie often enough, why, people will believe it. Well, if you tell the truth often enough, they’ll believe it and go along with you.”
― Harry Truman

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