Twumpism, AKA Tantrumism

Falling through the universe at the speed of life

By David Glenn Cox

I welcome the “new” world with its technological marvels. Who knows, maybe we can even save ourselves. But I lament the loss of the old way. With its traditions and fine examples, left to us over the eons of time. Before the information superhighway, the old order still held sway. If the boss came in and said, “I need those reports on my desk before five o’clock.” You would then generally focus your activities towards finishing the reports, before five o’clock.

Ramses decreed; “Pick up the stones. Pile them on top of each other until it looks like the pyramid next door, only bigger! No back talk, I don’t want to hear any lip out of you, so shut your pie hole!” The power of instant death meant Ramses got results! When Ramses wanted a Great pyramid, by God, Ramses got a Great fucking pyramid! “We’re moving the stones, oh Ramses; we’re staking the stones, oh Ramses. No need to get upset, we were only playing!”

Oh, Ramses? Some of the boys and I, feel like we’ve been hitting it pretty hard lately and wanted to know, if we could have the day off to go swimming? It’s a nice day and not cloud in the sky and being a workday, no crowds at the beach! Some of the others have doctor’s excuses, and there is a petition complaining about the lunch menu again. The stone cutters are unhappy with the chisels and are threatening to continue grumbling quietly under their breath, less they incur your ferocious wrath oh, Ramses!

Tell us Socrates, share with us your worldly wisdom. “You guys really need to stop hanging out around here. Maybe go out and meet some girls or something, or get a job!” But we desire to be educated men! “Do you know how it looks? A bunch of young guys hanging out in front of an old dude’s place. You guys are cock blocking grandpa here. Okay, you want an education, so here goes. This stuff is like Algebra, you’re not going to use it much, after you leave school.” What of the poets and attorneys and politicians, oh Socrates, do they not use philosophy and rhetoric?

“One more lesson and then class dismissed, capiche?  Now, I’m not saying that your average ambulance chasers won’t use this stuff or a hookedy crook. But in your day-to-day life in the marketplace and brothels of Athens, it’s not very useful. You guys probably should have taken shop class instead, and learned to make tables and chairs or something society, really needs.”

Los Angeles County, is under a vaccine mandate. Enter the new way; as the Los Angeles County Sherriff says, he won’t enforce the vaccine mandate. He has got a perfectly legitimate 21st Century reason for not enforcing it. He doesn’t want to. It would be very inconvenient see, because if 5 or 10% of the Sherriff’s Department quits or get laid off. That would lead to some hard and difficult days, so we choose rather not to participate. It was just like, drink your hard liquor at work day. I was against the idea at first, personally, but if people were gonna quit. I guess we have to go along, to get along.

The irony being, that the staff we hired and trained to make people do things that that they don’t want to do. Is now, refusing to do what we want them to do, because they don’t want to do it! Just because you’re my boss, doesn’t mean you can come in here and tell ME, what to do! “I have a legitimate excuse; I heard a guy on the late-night AM radio telling me, it wasn’t safe! (Uh, huh. Answer that!) Every one of these righteous objectors, have gotten inoculations at some point in their life, without knowing the ingredients of. I would wager that some probably had to get some inoculations, before being hired by the Sherriff’s Department.

“Genral Ney, prepare the troops. We advance at dawn!” We have a problem, Mon General; the men say there are nothing but two-star hotels after Warsaw! The men have been on Trip advisor again, and they say this a bad time of year to go. We can get better deals on hotels, if we book our rooms now for next Spring. I got to admitted it Nape. I think the man might have a point here. I was on the NOAA weather App and the long-term forecast in the East is bleak!

“Genral Ney, prepare the troops. We advance at dawn!” But where will the men charge their cell phones? How will they send and receive important e-mails and text messages from home, and share funny cat videos?

It would seem to me, that somewhere buried in the Cop School curriculum. While they were teaching the new recruits how to bark orders like “Hit the dirt or die scumbag,” before emptying their sixteen shot magazine Glock pistol.” That somewhere hidden in the text were instructions for also following orders, without whining and complaining.

Thousands of healthcare workers refusing to be vaccinated and they should know! They have AM radios and many work nights. That many healthcare workers being that upset about a vaccine means either the vaccine is unsafe, or they watch Faux News a lot. And since, hundreds of millions have been vaccinated successfully, without any major incident. I’m gonna go with Faux here.

Like hemorrhoid on a sphincter, this another outgrowth of Twumpism, AKA Tantrumism. If you stomp your feet and cry really loud for long enough, you don’t have to do anything that you don’t want. You don’t have to get a shot. You don’t have to accept the outcome the election. You don’t have to wear a mask or nothing. “I bet you’re one of those sheep, who stops because of a government stop signs!”

Boy, I tell you. If that would have worked back in the 60s, there would have been some tearful, great performances at the draft board. They could have sold tickets! “I won’t go to Vietnam! I won’t, I won’t! And you can’t make me! But, I don’t want too! What don’t you silly people understand? I said, I really don’t want too! Really, I’m being serious here! I don’t want to go! I get heat rash! The doctor my dad paid, says “I have bone spurs!”

“Fired! What do you mean, I’m fired? You can’t fire me! I have my rights! I don’t have to take orders from you if I don’t want to! Where do you get off trying to fire me? I have friends on the late-night AM radio,  I’m gonna kick and scream, like you wouldn’t believe! If you fire me,  I’ll sit by the phone and just wait for Faux News to call. I’ll show you! Then you’ll be sorry!” Our special guest tonight!

Sir: the men formed a committee and they asked me to speak with you sir, about their concerns. They’re good with the boat rides sir. But its this storming the beach at Iwo Jima idea, that you have in mind, that’s out the question.

Sir: before we attack, I feel it only fair to warn you,  that we’re dangerously low on tissues. And the ship’s store is already slap out of pacifiers! So, I think that you had better just call Admiral Halsey up and break the news, not today! The men don’t feel like it! And that’s final!

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