Don’t be Pigheaded, Just Dump Him

Falling through the universe at the speed of life

By David Glenn Cox

The Party’s over, it’s time to call it a day. Time to get out the plastic bags and start picking up all those beer bottles. The other day Twump lost Faux News, now he’s lost the very fringe of the lunatic fringe in Alex Jones. Interesting, how they all say the same things at the same time in different places. Almost like it’s not natural but coordinated.

Laura Ingrahm asks, “Maybe it’s time to turn the page” on Twump. Now, Alex Jones calls himself “pigheaded” for his unnatural attachment to Twump.  And by “Pigheaded” Jones means by extension that his listeners shouldn’t be pigheaded. There’s a new Satan in town and Jones has unnatural feelings for him, because of his dreamy eyes. Jones says, he can see sincerity Ron DeSantis’s eyes.

Now, when a bonafide professional hired liar, who just this month suffered a huge financial judgement in the tens of millions of dollars for lying to the public. Tells you that he can see sincerity in Death Ray Ronnie’s eyes. What do we know for sure in opposite land? Yes, means no, and no means definitely. It means out with the old and in with new. The King is dead, long live the King.

For Faux News it’s a clear business decision, from here on in the headlines look bleak and counter to the company’s agenda. Take the cameras off the old dude and let the public forget about him like a pumpkin in November or the mechanical bull at a country bar. Then slowly begin to change the focus and soften the lenses. Don’t talk about old what’s his name anymore. Instead talk about Death Ray Ronnie in glowing terms. “I like his pettiness and sadistic cruelty.”

For Donald Twump this is his climactic scene. Jimmy Cagney in “White Heat.” Come on up here and get me Coppers! Bang, bang! Robert DeNiro in “Taxi Driver,” You talking to me punk? Leonardo DiCaprio in “Save the Twumptanic!” Won’t anyone steer me vessel through these treacherous waters of fraud conspiracy and past the rocks of treason?  We offer: nice working conditions, casual Fridays, and free snacks in the break room! You must be willing to deal with a guilty and irascible client and must be willing to accept non-payment as payment in full.

The story behind the story, as Twump struggles to find and hold competent attorneys in this hour of his most desperate legal challenges. No one wants to pilot the Mary Celeste; no one wants to be the safety officer on the Titanic. (Dead Man Walking) Nobody volunteers to help General Custer rout those Indians. You couldn’t have gone to law school for very long and not see this shit show that’s a coming over the horizon.

To start with, a dead man without his glasses can see Twump is guilty, so there’s that. It is harder to frame a defense when your client is as obviously guilty as a chicken thief with feathers in his pockets. Now add in, he doesn’t take advice from anybody. And he has a tendency, to just wing it and just say, too hell with legal advice. It’s a real big feather in your cap to be an attorney for a former president and prestigious too, unless it’s Donald Twump.

The room is beginning to smell, and many front-rank attorneys don’t want it on their resume that they once represented old Blunder Bus. Especially at the going rate of free. Gone is the prestige of working for the President, replaced by the taint of working for that President. Anyone who has read, “The Cat in the Hat Comes Back” knows how taint spreads.

It’s not to say that Twump doesn’t have competent legal help, but I don’t think we’re in the major leagues anymore Toto. Chief Counsel for a parking garage company isn’t a slouch job, but NBC rarely wants to talk with you about it. It’s doubtful you’ll ever try a parking garage case before the Extreme Court.

Unless of course, the Republicans try to take a way a woman’s Constitutional right to park. “For as it says in the Bible, in first Delusionals 27. Let not thy women folk park thy chariots for the sight of their large bosoms and attractive buttocks offends the lord.” They are trying to defend the Alamo with water balloons.

Twump’s senior counsel blew up Twump’s lie about the FBI planting evidence. After she said that the search was witnessed in videoed. Rule # 1. The boss is always right, even if he’s out of his mind. There’s no twenty-fifth amendment to save you now!

Twump is going viral on his new hit series “The Raid at Donald’s House!”  

Always the new attorneys come on board confident, that they can ride the orange bull and tame him and make him to see good sense. And always they leave after missing a few paychecks, disgusted shaking their heads and talking to themselves.

But in a historical sense it’s the drone shot, the distance shot. The main character abandoned and friendless, all alone in his compound surrounded by enemies at the gate. They don’t know him anymore and don’t take his calls. He’s bruised from being touched by ten-foot barge poles. They don’t love him anymore like they used too as the light slowly dawns. Look what he did! The mob begins turns on the messiah because they are being told to turn on the messiah, and are about to rip him to shreds as ordered.

“Don’t be pigheaded, just dump him!”

Yesterday’s bad news. Let’s just wish it away into the cornfield, shall we? Let’s just pretend that it all never happened. There, isn’t that better? All those crimes and all that ugliness gone. Let’s just look away and talk about Ronnie. He’s so sincere.

Orwell, they have arrived! A Winston Smith brand fast-food presidential processing machine. Just interchange the pictures, throw in two minutes of hate. Talk about his dreamy eyes, he’s so much better than last guy, what was the last guy’s name again? Twumpism is turning toxic and poisoning the well.

They must find a way to deceive the Hoosters and Twumpanzis to convince them that they now like “NEW” Coke even better than they used to like “Old” Coke. And the best way to do that is to make them forget that “Old” Coke ever existed. “I like me that New Coke, I sure do, it’s got electrolytes! Not like that old Orange stuff. “Now filled with even more Hate and Viciousness!”

“A dying culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Lack of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

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