By David Glenn Cox
I have been amused recently at the political road signs wars here in the zone. A relevant and important part of the campaign when they were first ordered three months ago. Road signs now obsolete and almost embarrassing. “Protect our Elections!” Really, here in Arizona, you’d have the nerve to run on that old saw… again? Weren’t the three recounts performed at great public expense, good enough for you? Talk about your sore loser’s man.
Other road signs have Mao’s red banners splashed across them advertising “TWUMP APPROVED!” Like a health sticker from the department of agriculture. Baboon tested! Twump Approved! (Not intended for use by children under age three.) But the road signs have been disappearing and are not being replaced. Sign wars are common, but so are storms and the wind which also take their toll. Maybe, they are just saving their resources for closer to the showdown. But Labor Day is also the traditional kick off for the campaign season.
Maybe, they are no longer keen on advertising all that Twump approval, all at once. Let’s just keep that on the down low, between us, shall we? “Yes hello, Speedy Printers? I’d like to cancel that order and start a new one.” Or maybe they lost in their primary, despite the Twump magic. “Okay, then just cancel my order.”
But the remaining signs stick out in their incongruity. “He’ll protect us from Martians! Or four out of five dentists recommend him over other sugar free candidates. He’ll keep our children safe from books!”
The Republican candidate for governor declares, “If elected, she will solve the immigration problems at the border all by herself. And she’ll do it, with one hand tied behind her back! A national issue, involving many separate issues. Taking up a great deal of resources, not possible by any one state alone. “If elected, as the governor of this here fine state, I’ll cure climate change and make it rain! I’ll fix the trade imbalance and make the rivers run backwards!
But the silence and deflection illustrate not what they are running for, but what they are running away from. Political rain falls on the just and the unjust alike. See the sky about to rain? The tumult and sinking Republican tide began with the Jan 6th revelations, which bleeds over into Twump’s tax cases. Then, the Georgia election fraud investigation began making witnesses walk across red-hot coals. Then of course, we can’t forget Docu-gate. The perfect storm.
[Cue the theme music!] It’s the Tonight Show! With tonight’s special guests the too sick to testify Rudy Guiliani, Georgia Governor, Brian Kemp and our extra special guest. Senator Lindsey Graham, Senator Graham will be doing his impression of Marlon Brando in “On the Waterfront.” Making terroristic threats against America, Only in a falsetto and make up, while wearing women’s lingerie and heels.
“If you try and prosecute me or my friends! There will be riots in the streets! I’ll get these morons so worked up, they’ll piss themselves. There will be dead morons in streets everywhere. Dead morons as far as the eye can see. Senator Lindsey Graham goes on Faux and Fuckheads to warn America. That he’ll huff, and he’ll puff, and he’ll BLOW your house down! You had better not! You’ll be sorry, if you do! I’ll tell mom!
If it is yet another example of the old mantra, your mother probably told you about as a child. “If you squeeze a chicken hard enough, they’ll squawk!” Graham claims, that they are just coming after him, because they are trying to get to Twump. Who died and clued you in on that Colombo? But Graham is stuck, because he’s as guilty as chicken thief with eggs in his pockets.
Graham is caught dead to rights, just like Twump is caught dead to rights. Last month, Twump sent a veiled threat to the Attorney General, offering to help turn down the heat. This week, they threaten blood in the streets, if prosecuted for their crimes. For Twump, Instead of “Hail to the Chief” They should play the theme from “The Godfather.” You’s should be more careful; you’s could have a real bad accident doing something like that!
How desperate would you have to be to appear on Faux and threaten the public with violence and blood in the streets? The chief designer of the Titanic went back to his stateroom after the iceberg event, and was never heard from again. He knew he’d screwed up and there was no survival for him from this event. Survival would have been worse than death. He died disgraced, but with dignity.
How will Lindsey Graham survive? What will life be like for him after trial?
It’s time Rocky, time to ride the lightning! The governor never called. “No, no, no I don’t want to die! I didn’t do nothing! I made a few phone calls, that’s all! No, no, no you can’t take me away! (Grabs bedframe as dragged from his cell.) I don’t wanna die! Don’t make ME pull the switch and rat on Twump! Georgia Governor Brian Kemp is a witness for the prosecution, but he doesn’t want to testify against Twump either. (He’s scared, Mr. Big could seek his revenge.)
It becomes clear, this is a crash and burn scenario with no way out. The lightning which beholds the thunder. Twump realizes that he’s in a box now, and begins to squirm like a rat caught in a cage. Desperate for anything to change the subject or subjects. He latches on to Facebook, limiting the spread of Hunter Biden lies ahead of the 2020 election. Twump demands he be reinstated to the Presidency immediately, based on a sketchy news story from a Podcast.
The Republicans went straight from Hillary’s server to Hunter Biden’s laptop, without missing a beat. They wonder, why after conspiracy after conspiracy is proven wrong. Why the liberal media continues to ignores their scribbling’s?
Stories conveniently appearing at just the right moment, with lots and lots of speculation, innuendo and only the choicest conveniences. How did you happen to get your hands on Hunter Biden’s Laptop? “Well, he just walked in the door and handed it to us.” And sure, I’ll bet that happens all the time. (Some people would believe anything.)
Wasn’t Seth Rich true? Wasn’t there a pizza parlor sex cult in a Washington basement? Wasn’t Barrack Obama originally from Cambodia? Didn’t Hillary Clinton have cancer and wouldn’t survive to election day? Didn’t Hillary Clinton have a server in her basement? Wasn’t Nancy Pelosi going to step down at any minute? Didn’t John Kerry fight the North Vietnamese in a cowardly fashion? While George W. Bush kept the skies over Houston safe, and single handedly held down barstools to prevent them from floating away?
[Closing Narration] The tools of conquest do not necessarily come with bombs and explosions and fallout. There are weapons that are simply thoughts, attitudes, prejudices to be found only in the minds of men. For the record, prejudices can kill, and suspicion can destroy, and a thoughtless frightened search for a scapegoat has a fallout all of its own for the children, and the children yet unborn. And the pity of it is that these things cannot be confined to the Twilight Zone.
– Rod Serling