Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

By David Glenn Cox

Well, it won’t be long now. Kari Lake is trailing Katie Hobbs by 26,000 votes in the race for Arizona Governor. With only 160,000 votes left to count. Lake will need to win 105,000 of those votes to overtake Hobb’s current lead. But they are counting the mail-in ballots now and so, for an election denier, that’s highly unlikely.

If you are on the younger side, you probably don’t remember when Mount St. Helen exploded. Oh, it was a tremendous cataclysm and quite an event to see. Forests laid waste and a heat that would melt car windshields. A pyroclastic flow came down the side that mountain at near the speed of sound. With the explosive force of atom bombs.

And I mention it, only because if Kari Lake doesn’t win 105 of the last 160 thousand votes. You are going to see that spectacle of a similar explosive force unleashed again, and I wouldn’t want you to miss any of it.

Lake a former local Faux News anchor, famously lectures the media. “I’m going to be your worst nightmare. I’m going to teach you all how to do your jobs and be journalists!” When a reporter asks her a question, she immediately answers curtly like Gunny Sargent Hartman, “Name and affiliation scumbag.” Why does that matter? “Because we make lists of troublemakers around here, that’s why! So, you ask your question respectable when you speak to your betters!

Ms. Lake would be the first one to tell you. That if you ever read or see a story about her that is an anyway unflattering, it’s all lies and all the dirty, low down lying media’s fault again. They are all out to get her, just like they were all out to get Donald Trump.

 But she’s going to show them! Just you wait and see, the voters of Arizona are you going to rise up and smite you! And she will be their sword! She is going to be your worst nightmare. It was almost her campaign slogan. Elect Kari Lake – Your worst nightmare!

Katie Hobbs wouldn’t debate Lake on television. Because obviously, Lake would have an advantage as a media professional. Just as I wouldn’t go toe to toe with Bruce Lee or Mohamed Ali. Not to mention Lake’s propensity for name calling and making unfounded accusations and stunting.

Nearly every third thumbnail on my You Tube news feed is Kari Lake on Tucker Carlson or Kari Lake on Faux Business channel. But Kari is really pissed off now! Do you know what they did? The local Public television station affiliated with the state University invited Katie Hobbs to do a thirty-minute interview as the Democratic candidate for Governor.

“They can’t do that! Where do they get off? Interviewing Hobbs and giving her thirty minutes of free airtime. We should get em hard for that! I should be their worst nightmare from now on for that. That’s a public television station; they can’t get away with that! We’re taxpayers! I think you get the picture. God help you if Starbucks gets her coffee order wrong! She will be your worst nightmare.

Lake was visibly angry. How dare they give Hobb’s airtime, after she refused to debate Me? That’s not the way it supposed to go in Lake world. Because if you won’t debate Lake, then you can’t have any airtime at all. And anyone who gives Katie Hobbs airtime…goes on the list. And do you know what happens if your name is on the list, don’t you? That’s right, she’ll become  your worst nightmare.

It’s like waiting for the grand finale at the fireworks show. All the skyrockets going up at once and exploding in huge noisy loud lighted display. “Your Worst Nightmare!” Because, it is not impossible for Lake to still win this election, only it is highly unlikely, as the sands of time are rapidly running out.

I suppose everyone knows someone with a particularly bad temper. And you know in advance what’s going to happen when they see that parking ticket under the wiper blade or that dent in their fender. It’s schadenfreude, the joy of watching the ill-tempered suck on a big one.

Seismographs are in place and ready to record this eruption. Lake was asked, “If elected, would you promise to serve out your full term. If in the event some braindead incompetent moron offered, you the second spot on the S.S. Trumptanic. “YOU! Might be the next Mike Pence, you know! Are you ready to step into those gigantic shoes?”

But Lake has a pat answer out on the stump, “Listen here; I plan to serve two terms sonny! And I’m going to be your worst nightmare for next eight years!” She’s already won herself the next election too.

Election denier and Trump protégé, she wants to build the wall even bigger and meaner than Donald Trump. Maybe with grenade launchers or alligator pits. She’s against illegal migration, and she wants to be their worst nightmare. But for the homeless she offers “Tough Love.” Because we can all clearly see how loving and caring Kari Lake is already, deep down inside.

Listen here; you mentally ill, drug addicted sixty-year-old Army veteran. You need some tough love Mister. No more soft days of pan handling for food and living outside in the broiling sun or soft warm nights, sleeping under a nice soft comfortable concrete overpass. We’re gonna fix you (Cause we love you) with six months in jail. Doctors? Who needs doctors or hospitals? Why once they realize they are looking at jail time, they’ll stop being mentally ill or drug addicted.

Once they learn that we won’t coddle them anymore, they’ll stop being sick.

Be prepared, the call could come at any hour. Stock up on bottled water, milk, and bread. Remember to stay calm and try not to spread rumors. We can get through this volcanic eruption together. Keep your children close to the house. Carry a change of clothes and keep the gas tank full and carry some extra cash. No one can anticipate what might happen if the media call the election for the Democrat Katie Hobbs.

One thing for certain; it’s not going be pretty. Because Kari Lake promised; if elected, she’d be your worst nightmare. And if not elected, it could get even worse! Reading the names publicly from the enemies list. The names of all those people responsible for her election defeat.

This is somebodies fault you know! Somebody screwed this all up royally! This shouldn’t have happened, and somebody must be made to pay. They should have had this race in the bag!

And they would have too, if it wasn’t for those meddling kids and that dog with the speech impediment, asking me those impertinent questions. And the Liberal Public television station too, at the liberal University. The liberal press both print and broadcast, this is all their fault!

And the stupid voters of Arizona, this is all their fault too. You could have had Kari Lake as your governor, but no, YOU STUPID MORONS BLEW IT! You had your chance. And she had promised that if elected; she’d be the worst nightmare for anyone who spoke out or had hard thoughts against her. And when she finds out who was responsible for screwing up this election, she’ll be their worst nightmare too.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s