Crazy Doesn’t Work Anymore

By David Glenn Cox

It was Mitt Romney who famously told George Santos, “you don’t belong here.” It was a signal the Republicans in the Senate weren’t going to be playing along with new adventures in crazy town crowd. It was big news and welcome news. The highlight of the SOTU speech for Republicans, a dignified voice in the wilderness.

Liz Cheney is gone there’s no one left to stop them anymore. So, when Marge Tater Greene says we should have a National Divorce. The media immediately looked to Mitt. “Let’s ask Mitt! He’s not crazy!” Mitt like it of not is becoming the voice of reason rather than the voice of treason. The voice of the loyal opposition inside the Republican Party.

Mitt is a Senator, not some crazy House member. Mitt has dignity, and he doesn’t carry balloons or hand guns and doesn’t spout theories about stolen elections or Jewish Space lasers. So as the George and Kevin and Marge Party run independent voters away. And little Ronnie Schicklgruber tries to build the Fourth Reich in Florida. Mitt begins to look like Presidential timber again.

Oh how, oh how, can the Republican Party save themselves from the new adventures in crazy town crowd?  Children running amok with a substitute teacher Kevin McCarthy in charge. In less than two months the Republican House majority have made the Party a mockery of itself. Satirist struggle to keep up. How can you satirize when you just can’t make this stuff up?

Sedition, witch hunts, frauds, liars, clowns, and Mitt. He’s the assistant Principal trying to take control of the unruly class and make them behave. But hey, wait a minute. That guys not crazy! He speaks in complete sentences and wears shoes! He eats with table manners and closes his mouth when he chews. He could be perfect!

Trump bashes Schicklgruber. Trump bashes Nikki Haley. Schicklgruber bashes Trump. Marge Greene bashes Nikki Haley. Republican radicalism is bringing about the potential end of the Republican Party due to Father time. The Republican culture war is alienating the young. The largest demographic of the electorate.

This younger generation is strongly prochoice and pro LBGTQ rights. They are the most left leaning generation since the 1930s. They don’t care about Republican manifestations about wokeness. They worry about book banning and authoritarian behavior. The Republican House is teaching a class in self-delusion and self-destruction. “Oh, if only there were some alternative to all these crazy Mofo’s!”

And the net result of the Republicans in crazy town crowd howling at the moon is nothing. A big pile a crazy proposals which have gone nowhere. Mitt becomes the Party’s only chance to retain some of its dignity. He told George Santos to go sit down. And then Mitt said, the Administration did the right thing shooting down the balloon. And it becomes like a scene out of Idiocrasy, “Woah, that was really smart!”

“Wow, you mean the Administration can actually do the right thing sometimes. Wow, that’s really smart!”

Marge and her National Divorce should take a look at a map. Once there was only California west of the Mississippi. Then Oregon and Washington. Then Nevada went Blue and then New Mexico and finally Arizona.

Not one traditionally blue state has gone red, but more states are going blue. Georgia is a case in point. It’s so close that all it takes is something stupid done by the Republicans for the Democrats to win. “Let’s run Herschel Walker for Senate. He can write his name and doesn’t have too many skeletons in his closet.” But he lives in Texas! “So?” Trump tried to radicalize Georgia giving it two Democratic Senators. Kari Lake through Trump tried to radicalize Arizona. Giving Arizona a Democratic Governor and Attorney General.

It’s only a matter of time not more than a year or two, before Republican strategist come to the sad  conclusion that crazy just doesn’t work anymore.

Traditionally Republicans run to the extreme right in the early days and then move towards the center in the General election. But there is a disconnect in that after calling for sedition, you can’t walk that back in the general election. Republican strategists worry that the Florida Schicklgruber has already gone too far. Book banning and angry firings paints a picture of a candidate who comes across as angry, bitter, and brooding.

His Reich building plays well inside the confederacy but nationally Schicklgruber has got loser painted all over him. No charisma, no charm and no, “let me tell you a funny story!” Ronnie doesn’t tell funny stories. He doesn’t make the audience laugh, nationally he makes them recoil in horror.

That leaves Trump, No party leaders first choice. Sure, the crazies all love him, but all the Republican candidates are going for the crazy audience. The big money boys have sworn off of Trump. They don’t believe that Trump can win. His legal troubles spoil the broth and with only 30% of the Party. Trump is more of a bother than a viable candidate.

So, what’s a billionaire to do out to avoid paying taxes and environmental legislation. Squander money on Trump and Schicklgruber? If only, there were just one sane Republican! If only there were someone who spoke in complete sentences. Someone with a little credibility and class. Where oh where could we find such a candidate? You say he eats with silverware. He doesn’t lie about having knee replacements and really did go to college.

He’s never been arrested or stolen puppies. He doesn’t advocate for sedition or a civil war or overthrowing the Constitution? “Wow, he’s perfect!” But there is only one problem. The Republican electorate would never vote for him.

The Republican electorate are so radicalized they swallow their own propaganda. They want more stunts and more rough talk. They want wars against CRT and wokeness! They are against everything! They want a civil war and reeducation camps to combat liberalism. Marge should carry two balloons next time! The Republicans should throw water balloons at the next SOTU speech.

Poisoned by their own Kool aid and radicalized out of the mainstream. Republican extremism makes them unelectable nationally. Trump has gone too far and alienated a sizable majority of the electorate. The Florida Reich’s Fuhrer has also gone too far and alienated a sizable majority of the electorate. Two radical candidates with neither capable of victory.

A Republican House majority that is clowning and stunting their way towards their own doom. What’s a radicalized Party going to do to try and save themselves? Where oh where can the Republicans find someone to run who is decent and respectable?

The Republicans want radical candidates. Independent voters want sane and sensible candidates. The Republicans can’t and won’t compromise on their radicalism. They can’t or won’t accept sane credible or respectable candidates. They have locked the canopy on their Kamikaze fighters and are headed out for Fort Sumter.

“If this nation is to be wise as well as strong, if we are to achieve our destiny, then we need more new ideas for more wise men reading more good books in more public libraries. These libraries should be open to all—except the censor. We must know all the facts and hear all the alternatives and listen to all the criticisms. Let us welcome controversial books and controversial authors. For the Bill of Rights is the guardian of our security as well as our liberty. – John F. Kennedy