Rocky is Down!

By David Glenn Cox

Damn it all! I really hate it when I’m forced to agree with Donald Trump. It makes feel all dirty and I want to wash myself with alcohol, but only internally of course. But damn it; when he’s right, he’s right. As much as he talks, he’s bound to get something correct occasionally. He said, Ron DeSantis has the charm of reheated tofu. I couldn’t have said that any better. “Trump shoots and Trump scores!”

It is all a part of Trump’s new campaign to scuttle the Ron DeSantis Love boat before it can leave port and set sail. How do you make yourself the Republican nominee for the White House? You destroy the competition. That wouldn’t hurt the Party too much, would it? Trump partisans have filed a 15-page ethics complaint alleging DeSantis is engaging in a shadow campaign for President to skirt ethics laws. Spaghetti meet wall!

An old Cuban proverb says. “Don’t push the little horse he will fall by himself.” The Trump assault is understandable but unnecessary. The sparks from the DeSantis cultural fireworks show will eventually burn down the Plantation house. A three Judge panel has stopped the W.O.K.E. Act in its tracks, and in the most scathing terms too. A DeSantis spokesman said, he is sure the Governor will eventually prevail. But he’s only whistling past the graveyard as the court made it clear that they’ve heard enough.

Ronnie’s signature legislation has just been thrown out and his bicycle, the one he intended to ride on to Washington no longer has any wheels. Oh well, he can still kick Disney in the ass occasionally or fire school teachers for looking at him crossways.

Personality matters, Franklin Roosevelt had a big beaming smile and self-assured confidence. He would routinely barbeque Republicans and never stop smiling and would let go with a boisterous laugh. John Kennedy had youth, wit and good looks on his side. It was once said of Richard Nixon that a sex scandal would have actually helped Nixon’s campaign. Nixon came across as dry and droll until few actually believed that it was possible for Nixon to have a girlfriend.

DeSantis has the look of a shop foreman about announce layoffs. The DeSantis cultural war appeals to his base but comes across nationally as dark and mean spirited. Then when former Guantanamo inmates say that DeSantis watched them being tortured. What whoa! But sometimes, when you start a fire, it can get out of control and burn you. A new Florida bill would outlaw little girls from asking questions about their periods in Florida schools until they were much older and didn’t need to ask.

The advantages of picking on children are obvious, they can’t fight back, and they don’t vote. The disadvantage, you can’t chain them into stress positions or waterboard them. And sometimes, just sometimes, it might make you look like a bully. A mean-spirited bully picking on little school kids and out to destroy their education. Maybe a sex scandal would at least humanize DeSantis.

Trump is a cult leader with 100% name recognition. And you must beat the champ to take his crown. Trump can literally say anything, “You know, I was talking to Jesus the other day and he had a problem he wanted me to help him with.” Stormy who? Georgia what? Where’s that? Trump was recently invited to tell his side of the story to the Grand Jury in Manhattan. But he declined to testify because in the words of his attorney, “he’s innocent.”

That makes perfect sense to me, if you’re innocent you don’t bother to tell your side of the story, just tell them all to buzz off. But the cultist only accept the news they want to hear from Rupert Murdoch. So, they will never hear about it and even if they do will take Trump’s side because after all, it’s a cult.

DeSantis has got his hands full. That is going to be one tall mountain of bullshit he must climb. And most distressingly, he must attempt to make that climb without any noticeable personality. And Florida Rocky doesn’t stand a chance, Orange Apollo is about to beat Florida Rocky into mush.

“ CAESAR: Let me have men about me that are fat;
Sleek-headed men and such as sleep o’nights:
Yond Cassius has a lean and hungry look;
He thinks too much: such men are dangerous.”

Ambition is a good thing but too much ambition can be a bit intimidating to voters. DeSantis comes across as a man who would sell his own mother by the pound to become President. Now, add in his Heinrich Himmler personality deficit.

Social Media is already filled with comparisons of DeSantis Florida to 1930s Nazi Germany. Each new Desantis attack on school teachers, little girl’s menstrual flows or hotel chains only strengthens those impressions. And as a former Alabamian, I take it hard; we once held a monopoly on the goofiest politicians with the stupidest most repressive laws. Now we’ve been usurped! It will be hard to get that title back again but trust me, they will never stop trying.

History tells us that Trump is resilient. No amount of corruption, Grand Juries or sex scandals can pierce his shield. But DeSantis worked at the notorious Guantanamo prison where the public not knowing what he did there is almost worse than knowing. Add in his Fascist Nazi behavior along with the personality deficit and let’s see him try to laugh it off. When he never laughs and has the personality of reheated tofu.

Trump never tortured prisoners but only because it would have interfered with his TV watching schedule and besides, he never thought of it. Don Junior had to make an appointment to speak with his father, if that gives you any flavor of the man. Mr. Clean Magic Eraser will take those ketchup stains right off that wall.

Back before the Internet, back when companies advertised on the back pages of magazines. There was one advertisement as constant as Trump’s lies. Charles Atlas promised that he could turn anyone into a body builder in just 15 minutes a day. The cartoon advertisements always followed the same plot. A muscle-bound bully at the beach kicking sand in the face of the skinny little wimp. In some of the advertisements, the wimp’s girlfriend left with the bully, while in others she only disparaged his manhood.

Guess who the bully is here and guess who is going to get sand kicked in his face? “Rocky is down! And the doctor’s been called. Rocky’s not breathing! He’s been beaten into mush!

“And since you know you cannot see yourself,
so well as by reflection, I, your glass,
will modestly discover to yourself,
that of yourself which you yet know not of.”
― William Shakespeare

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s