Betting the House

By David Glenn Cox

The orange one held his rally in Waco to a moderate turnout of the true believers. Not a political rally so much as a cult rally and prayer meeting of the fully indoctrinated. Trump’s secret formula is to find a safe spot in a secondary market and then to appear on a Friday or Saturday night. Someplace where the circus coming to town is still a big deal and finally, it’s free.

But reports say the crowd began to dissipate thirty minutes after the former President who still has himself introduced as President Donald Trump began to speak. Jimi Hendrix used to complain about the same thing. People came, just so they could say that they saw him and not to appreciate his music. Clearly, if you attend a Trump rally hoping to hear the latest news you are setting yourself up for a disappointment.

Vendors report slow sales on Trump regalia. They might still support Trump, but they aren’t as anxious to tell the neighbors about their support. Just more division inside a political Party hopelessly divided by the orange zombie Trump. Don’t doubt that they don’t still really love or believe the orange Bagwan.

But some animals are more equal than others. Some will pick peas all day in the hot sun, while others will only shout encouragement from the shade. But Tom Sawyer says, If they aren’t buying the merchandise, they aren’t buying the Kool aid.

For some, it is Trump or nobody while others are at least willing to listen to a Ron DeSantis. But the die hards call Ronnie a fraud and a loser, while others call him their second choice if Trump doesn’t win the nomination. Always with the caveat that Trump will most certainly win.

Trump is about as subtle as a fart in church letting go with his laundry list of “Mom! They’re picking on me!” Literally preaching to the choir. The crowd doesn’t care about Trump’s legal woes. They’re certain he’s innocent, and they aren’t afraid, certain their orange Jesus will escape whatever traps the devil has set for him. Forgetting how the story ended badly for the last messiah.

Until the event has all the hallmarks of a comeback tour. “I’m gonna sing you a melody of all of my greatest hits only with longer guitar solos this time.” Trump had nothing new to say about anything only saying it louder and more extreme. Promising mass deportations Nazi Germany style.

A show of hands, who really believes that would ever happen? But it doesn’t matter, the cult doesn’t deal in facts or actual possibilities they deal strictly in fantasy. If orange Jebus says so, so shall it be. Trump’s gonna find that wall, no matter where Joe Biden hid it!

For little Ronnie DeSantis it spells big trouble. As Reich’s Fuhrer it requires him to be cock sure in all things. And while Ronnie’s  got the first part down pat, Ronnie recently waffled on support for Ukraine. As a Congressman, Ronnie supported aid to Ukraine and then as Governor Reich’s Fuhrer, he was against it. Then the Fuhrer phone rang, and Ronnie got the word from the big boys upstairs and now, he’s for it again.

Ronnie was fist pounding the lectern beating up on theme parks and elementary school teachers. Then came the news from up among the free states that he is sinking in the polls. Ronnie Reich’s Fuhrer then cries out with the claims of bullying and book banning are all a plot against me and not true. Then a Florida school principal is fired for allowed pictures of a classical naked statute to be shown to sixth graders. As the titters become open laughter.

Ronnie is forced out into the bright sunshine of reality while Trump is not. Trump can tell the crowd he built the wall and Joe Biden stole it and hid it away. That jobs are pouring out of the country and the country is going to hell in a hand basket and the simian’s cheer. Ronnie says the “woke” crowd are making up book banning plots about him, and all Ronnie gets are crickets.

But orange Jebus has something that Ronnie Reich’s Fuhrer doesn’t have, a minor league farm system. Minions in Congress willing to backstop all of Trump’s “poor me” claims. It’s a lucky thing for Jim Jordan he’s elected from a district of the wealthy only concerned about their taxes. His buffoonery is becoming legendary. Congressional oversite is just that, oversite over the affairs of Congress. Not oversite over the affairs of everything that goes on in the entire world.

“Hello? This is Congressman Jim Jordan’s office, am I speaking to (Click) they hung up…again!”

Chief Yellow tie ignored a subpoena regarding his whereabouts and doings on January 6th. Yet becomes outraged when others ignore his subpoenas where they have no jurisdiction. When as a locker room coach at Ohio State Jimi was in full charge of both the washing machine and the dryer. But knew nothing about the molestation of the athletes going on in the very same locker room. Now as a Congressman from Wealthyville, Ohio he demands to know everything.

Because he’s backstopping Donald Trump along with Kevin McCarthy and Marge Tirebiter Greene. Ignoring every and all things in loyal service to the orange Bagwan. Trump warns that anyone who supports or works for Reich’s Fuhrer DeSantis campaign will be black balled from positions inside the next Trump Administration. Thou shall have no false idols before me! Jimi yellow tie wants to be Secretary of State and Marge of the Mouthies wants to be Vice President. Drowning man, meet anchor.

Congressional Trumpozoids promise legislation protecting former Presidents from criminal investigations. Where oh where, do they honestly believe that legislation is going? After Fox News it’s going straight into the trash. It would never make through a skeptical Senate tiring of being tarred with the Trump/House Trumpozoid brush. If it ever made it to the White House, the laughter would rock the foundations of the building.

Trump calls this the last battle, in a candid acknowledgement that the orange Bagwan knows that he’s betting the house. (The mother of all battles – Saddam Hussein) The Manhattan DA gets death threats, but that’s not really news. Everyone who speaks against the cult gets death threats. The Proud Boys are accused of vandalizing a church for supporting and hosting a Drag show. Yep, attacking churches that’s gonna win you some votes in suburbia.

It’s all or nothing and the magic eight ball says “Signs point to no.” It’s one toke over the line sweet Jesus. Tomorrow is just so far from today and I wonder and wonder away. Can we ever make as it once was again yesterday? The Congressional Republicans are betting the House in support of a delusional former President who offers them nothing in return but their own ruination.

“Yesterday,

All my troubles seemed so far away

Now it looks as though they’re here to stay

Oh, I believe in yesterday” – Lennon/McCartney

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