This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

Can you feel it? That slight chill in the fall evening that tells you change is in the air. Change is coming, it’s inevitable. Ruth Ben-Ghiat, an expert on authoritarianism says the GOP will implode. I myself fall back on Newton’s laws of motion. It goes up, it must come down or the famous Firesign Theater’s “Testicles Deviant,” It goes in, it must come out.

What happens when the baseball star can’t hit the fastball anymore? What happens when you trip over the hurdles, or the stock car goes over the wall? From the day Trump lost the election, it became inevitable. A gangster got him a good thing, a gangster is gonna fight to keep it. Donald Trump could have stepped aside graciously and accepted his loss and said, “See you in 2024!” Instead, Trump poisoned the waters with election denial.

Maybe, Trump thought it was a good idea at the time? Maybe, he didn’t think about it at all like a goldfish wonders what’s for lunch tomorrow. Just acting on dull impulse, but scorched Earth politics are the tactic of the last ditch and they lost. Like, defeated man! Vanquished, off to Buck’s Pocket with you!

The coup failed, the campaign after the coup failed. Former President Trump now faces a host of Federal and state criminal charges. Every single member of the Republican Party is on one side of this issue or the other. And ah, well, a house divided against itself. There is enough culpability among the Republican members of the House and Senate to fill the courts for years.

History says a lot of coup plotters get two in the back of the head in the courtyard. I told them to run, but they wouldn’t listen. There are no governments that forgive sedition, they’re coming hard for you now, hard. These guys are real done cookies with no escape.

Indicted coup plotters are now pitted against each other like scorpions in a bottle. Who is going to flip on whom, and what might they say? You know that feeling; someone could find out that something you’ve been trying to keep quiet, and you might lose your retirement funds to legal fees over it.

Sounds like Testicles Deviant to me…they’re fucked! And that’s always bad for business. The King has fallen and can’t get up. The backwash of his past actions follow him and dog him and becomes the primary issue of the campaign. Why should Joe Biden ever need say a fucking word? Let them fight over Trump. Trump is the bone caught in the throat of the Republican Party, which they cannot dislodge.

Trump is throttling the Party like in Aliens, using it for his own ends. Keeping the Party in a Stockholm syndrome strangled state of denial. They love Mister Trump; but don’t know why, they just do. And they might believe he’s totally innocent, but they must have questions and secret suspicions that all is not as it appears. That’s not a good thing in a cult. A thread of maybe the leader is guilty is corrosive.

How can a national Political Party, honestly put forward a dishonest candidate? Facing imprisonment, without tarring them all with the Trump brush. As Trump goes, so go they all. The bus is careening down the mountain road with no brakes and Donald Trump is behind the wheel. What could possibly go wrong?

 You say the GOP might implode, huh? What tipped you off?

Pollsters say Donald Trump is running dead even with Joe Biden, but what people say to pollsters and what they do, are two different things. Trump is a used car and the excitement is gone. A zombie Frankenstein, staggering through the campaign countryside and his Truth, social media between court appearances. And what happens when the ocean liner hits the iceberg? A story with only one tragic ending possible.

This is still just the beginning; we are still at the front door. As litigation continues and the statements come out, can only further darken the poisoned waters. They were taught the elections were fixed anyway, so why get excited? They were taught it is just the politicization of the Justice department and political prosecution.

But they’re still watching them go off to prison, aren’t they? So, we can’t win anyway belief sinks in, and besides Trump is a used car beyond its sale date. Let’s just stay home and watch wrestling.

There should be an alternative to Donald Trump inside the Republican Party. But this collection of nebbishes that stand as Presidential timber. Winston Churchill once wrote, “The length of this document assures us that it will never be read.” And the size of the Republican candidate pool assures us they will never be listened to. The debate was like The Simson’s did it.  I’m Diamond Joe Quimby. And issue number one was Donald Trump.

Would you pardon Donald Trump on your first day in office? A subliminal acceptance of the concept of criminal wrongdoing with legal ramifications of said actions. But we’re all willing to look the other way because Trump’s such a neat guy? And if elected, on day one, I will go against the will of the courts and pardon convicted criminals! That’s our vision for America! Get out of jail free cards for everybody!

Redistricting maps in two Republican states and one Presidential candidate have been kicked to the curb by the Federal courts. Conservative Justices are facing charges of corruption and Imperial insubordination. It is like predicting what happens between the ERRRRRRR! And the Crash! The Republican Secretary of State Ken Paxton in Texas is being impeached by the Republican Texas Senate.

 A Republican Senator from Alabama is holding up military promotions, assuring us the military will never vote Republican again. Just to get his picture in the paper and convince the home folks he’s a Bible loving Christian without ever lifting a finger. And all he did was lose Space Command the same way he lost at Auburn. Other than that, things are quiet.

I don’t think a GOP implosion is a future subject, but a current event and an uncontrolled chain reaction. Not the ghost of Christmas Future but of Christmas now. I can’t see any scenario of current events today combined with future events (litigation) which could possibly ever knit together a winning combination in the election. The erosion has already begun, and the rot is setting in and it’s getting dark.

“Testicles Deviant,” It goes in, it must come out and now it’s going to hurt.