This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

Did Donald Trump really call Kamala Harris a bitch? Did the sun come up this morning? How is that really even “News”? I bet he calls six people bitch before lunch. Believe it or not; we only see the nice Mr. Trump. He’s probably not as nice as he appears on stage. Besides, if you’d been on the ride, he’s been on for the last few weeks. You’d be calling people “Bitch” too.

There he was all alone in the driver’s seat with every bounce going his way and then, it all fell in around his ears. Then someone fell for a phishing scam promising an Amazon Gift card and the campaign was hacked by the super clever Iranians. Exposing a 270-page document of J.D. Vance’s vulnerabilities. Wow! I might suck, but nowhere near 270 pages! I doubt you could get more than a hundred or a 150 or so on me. But that might explain his selection. No one is ever going to read 270 pages in the Republican Party. Unless of course, it happens to get leaked.

But there is a growing panic down in Trumpy Town. Celebrity Punk Joe Rogan says; You know, I sure like that Kennedy guy and I’m tired of the same old Democrats and Republicans. Then, after the cult came after him. Rogan back peddles furiously, But don’t ask me! I don’t know nothin about nothin, about no politics! Joe knows paychecks. The cult is unforgiving, and you can only fall from the highwire once and that’s it. They’ll move on, and the circle just gets smaller. White Redneck Nick Fuentes has denounced Big Brother to the inner Party faithful.

They see something and are trying to say something. Trump is losing his edge and losing the lunatic fringe. He’s lost a step and they know it. He’s not as sharp as he used to be. Check out this pearl of wisdom, “Which is incapable of solvin’ even the sollest…smallest problem. The simplest problems we can no longer solve. We are an institute in a powerful death penalty.” Real Gettysburg address stuff, huh?

It’s a fine mixture and when you get it right it cooks, but when wrong, it stinks. Trump is more Trumpy than ever. The cracks are beginning to show. He’s so much more conceited and even more self-centered than four years ago. Everything is about him in comparison. If he took a dump this morning, it was the greatest dump ever taken. But you are only the new kid on the block once and now, you’re old and the same old thing as before, only more so.

That’s why a good con man never unpacks. Things of this sort can deteriorate quickly, and travel plans made suddenly. Once it is over, it’s over. Led Zeppelin changed their sound for every album offering the public something old and something new. Mr. Trump is offering the public something old and something getting older. Ali McBeal after her haircut.

2016 was a long time ago. For the average American nonpolitical junkie, it is a lifetime. Imagine how many voters have come of age or passed from it since 2016. The party faithful scratch their heads as Mr. Trump flies to Bozeman, Montana. Meanwhile, his opponents stump the swing states drawing huge crowds. Trump answers with, “See you next week!” Next week? Ah, tick tock, time flies. Do you know how you make; an old car look older? Park it next to a new one.

This is very similar to 1948. When the Republican Thomas Dewey, would have reporters in for a quiet softball chat. While Harry Truman was out shaking hands and campaigning from the back of a train for weeks at a time.

Sadly, the choice of J.D. Vance might just be the mooring mast at Lakehurst. You don’t need 270 pages! He looks like the guy who stole Pee Wee’s bicycle. The kind of guy you wouldn’t buy insurance or a used car from. The idea is to balance the ticket. If you’re an extremist, you want a moderate to the balance the ticket. Instead, they have two extremists. And the boss picked him, and the boss is never wrong so that’s that. J. D. in an effort to “manage” the dislikeablity issue. Maintains that the pick of a Vice President is unimportant really. Just a do nothing make work job with a free house. Unless of course you are tied to a 78-year-old diabolical maniac in poor health.

Cognitive decline is now a real issue. Trump’s once a week campaign is a real issue. Trump’s name calling is not a real issue. Only the part where Trump’s name calling becomes less and less effective is actually important. He can’t find a name to call Kamala Harris. The shticks not working like before, so he tries harder and pushes harder. They dig up the corpse of Ronald Reagan to ask. Are you better off now than you were four years ago? That’s the wrong question to ask.

Never bring up rope in the house of a man who was hanged. They are asking, do you want to go back to that? To Impeachments, lies and mobs storming the capitol with murder, mayhem and endless court cases? Oh gee, those were the good old days, huh? What do they promise for tomorrow? More of the same only worse. If Mr. Trump has such a lackadaisical attitude towards campaigning, what sort of President would he be?

That’s the way it goes sometimes. One day you think you can play trombone just by thinking you can. The next, you have a garage full of Amway products. You have a lighted disco floor you’re still paying for or a mechanical bull gathering dust in the corner. Once the bubble bursts, it’s over. Life can be a bitch that way sometimes! You can never go home again.

“Time wounds all heels.” ― Groucho Marx