This Carbon Based Life

By David Glenn Cox

Attention: all rats desirous of leaving a sinking vessel…this way. What’s that old adage about the first one to the courthouse tells the most truth? The last one to the courthouse, goes to jail. It’s foreshadowing. Pam Bondi has a clean canvas and a palette filled with colorful stories, all about Todd. You can learn a lot from an exit interview. As you may remember, Ms. Pam was unceremoniously fired by the president and replaced by Bondi’s assassin, I mean her assistant Todd Blanche.

Out! Vamoose! No phony government job for Pam, she’s out on her keister and after all she did for him too! I sense a hostility disrupting the Force. Hell hath no fury quite like getting your boss fired. Ms. Pam, after stall and delay while employed, has now found the time to sit down with Congress. Todd did that! No matter what the subject or the question. Todd Blanche was the most proactive, Assistant Attorney General of our times and Ms. Bondi was just sort of a figurehead they all looked up to and a go between, between Todd and the president. Either that or Bondi’s lying.

Clearly, there is bad blood. Bondi is foreshadowing and spinning the bones of a narrative. Pam doesn’t want to talk about Donald, but she’s more than willing to tell you all about Todd. We’re through the looking glass here, people! This is our first actual view behind the green curtains of Oz. How do this machine operate? Pam Bondi is a principal, and she’s ready to talk, sort of. This is all so reminiscent of the Watergate hearings. Todd did what? Tell us more. What else did Todd do?

And if Bondi is spinning the narrative, and if it makes others uncomfortable or legally vulnerable, they will begin to dispute Bondi’s version of the narrative, and we can call for full Congressional hearings. (Redenbacher Time!) Starring Todd Blanche and a cast of thousands! “Who worked out the deal with Ghislaine Maxwell?” Oh, Todd did that! Do you smell something burning? One thing in this world is now set in granite. When this crooked regime finally caves in. Todd Blanche will be a head fallen on. Does Las Vegas take bets on prison terms? What do you feed a scapegoat?

Guilty or not, Bondi has woven Todd’s name into the fabric of the administration’s criminality. You can’t hardly mention the name Jeffery Epstein now without the name of Todd Blanche coming up. Todd and his sweetheart deal with Maxwell signed off on by Trump, but now, all Todd’s idea. Here, Todd, have an anchor. It reminded me of a story a cop told me once. Him and his partner walked up on a dice game in an alley. His partner picked up the dice and began to laugh. “Shaved like a barber, done it!” he said. Then threw the dice back down, turned around and said, “dipshits!” before walking off. Forty-five minutes later, shooting on Highland Ave.

That’s what they’ve done to Todd. Pam was painting a target on Todd’s back. Isn’t it wonderful? They’ve begun to turn on each other! And I’m giddy with delight, because somewhere out there is the next “John Dean!” It’s the first crack in the ice, and it won’t be the last.

The court ruled, It’s the Kennedy Center again! And never was legally anything else. The Congress named it the Kennedy Center, and only Congress can change it. Boy, howdy! I bet that one hit hard. I bet that one really pissed Trump off. They just got the name changed, and had all the new letters put up and all spaced out everything and now they have 14 days to take it all down. In my mind, I can see the smoke rising from Donald’s ears like a Looney Tunes cartoon. All those unsightly marks in the marble, where the letters for Donald Trump had been removed. I say we leave the marks as they are, like battle damage at Henderson Field. To remind us all, and for all time. That’s Donald Trump’s memorial, the ugly marks in the stone.

Meanwhile, back at the presidential hideout; Donald Trump debates the future of the world. His Highness, hindquarter hasn’t decided yet, if he will accept the terms of defeat offered to him by Iran. But Mr. Trump is playing an old Hitlerian ploy also popularized by Guns and Roses. Make them wait. Let them stew in their own juices. Let their anticipation fever build. Thirty minutes late? No, I’ve been here the whole time. Only, they’ll like the show much better if they have to wait on it a bit. Do you own a dog, Pavloff?

If Mr. Trump makes us wait long enough and holds us breathless in anticipation. That way you’ll be less likely to read the fine print. Just joyous over our victory. We won! Hooray! The strait is open; the oil is flowing, and we’ll talk about everything else someday when people aren’t paying so much attention. Does Iran keep its nuclear program? We’ll talk about that later. What about the sanctions? Later! What about reparations? Are you deaf? Later!

Mr. Trump and his regime said they attacked Iran, because Iran wasn’t negotiating fast enough. Ninety-two days, thirteen dead, and billions of dollars later. Are they negotiating fast enough to suit you now? It has to be frustrating, firing people trying to get just the team you want in place. And then; wouldn’t you just know it! Just as you get that team up and running that old, old conventional wisdom comes back and hits you right between the eyes. And then, everything that those old know-nothings had warned you about, has come to pass. Trump fired the fortune tellers and kept the quacks. Everything which has come to pass in Iran, has been common knowledge of what would happen for decades. Look what Todd did!

“Grant stood by me when I was crazy, and I stood by him when he was drunk, and now we stand by each other.”  ― William T. Sherman

Attention: all rats desirous of leaving a sinking vessel…this way!